9 things to stop doing to get the most out of life

I’ve said this many times, but we all the the power inside of ourselves to get the most out of life & reach our fullest potential. While we all have this potential, we are often the ones holding our own selves back.

I’m very passionate about living life to the fullest because we all have this one life to live. We have this one life and we are the ones holding ourselves back from getting the most out of this life.

Over the last couple of years, I have come to realize all of the things that I am in control of & how I have been focusing on the wrong things. In this post, I am laying out 9 of the most prevalent things that I bet you are probably doing, that you should probably stop doing so you can start getting the most out of life. ❤

Making excuses.

We are constantly making excuses for ourselves, even when we don’t even notice it. Do you ever catch yourself saying things like:

  • “I don’t have time”
  • “I don’t have what it takes”
  • “I will never be able to be successful”
  • “I’m not pretty enough”
  • “I’m not good enough”
  • “Nothing ever works out for me”

Whether you want to believe it or not, those are all excuses. They are all excuses holding yourself back from living your life to the fullest. They are excuses that keep you right where you are. In order to get the most out of life, you have to get rid of those constant excuses for not showing up fully for yourself.

Try to catch yourself making these excuses. You are probably saying them so much that you just believe it and don’t even consider it to be an excuse. But, it is! Get rid of those excuses & start taking ACTION on your life & reaching those goals of yours!

Complaining all the time.

This is a big one and something that I think it really important to try to monitor in order to start getting the most out of life. Constantly complaining about every little inconvenience really trains your brain to go into this “woe-is-me” mentality & will also have you stressing out about things that really don’t need your energy. Once I started taking the time to create an awareness around all of the things I was complaining about throughout each day, it became really clear why I was feeling so frustrated all the time. These things are often not in our control & honestly, not worth getting all worked up about.

Really take the time to think about all the things that you are complaining about throughout the day. 

Things like,

  • Too many people at the grocery store
  • The person in front of you driving too slow
  • Food service is slow

There are just so many things that you are probably complaining about to yourself that you don’t even know about. But I think that it is really important to create an awareness around everything you are complaining about because it does start to weigh heavy on your subconscious. You start doing it automatically without even knowing that you are doing it and it’s going to start making you not feel so good about yourself. 

So, create an awareness around all the things that you catch yourself complaining about. Especially with what others are doing and create alternative perceptions. Even if the other person isn’t doing something for that reason, it really makes you feel so much better overall. 

This is definitely so much easier said than done, but creating the awareness is the first step!

Beating yourself up.

We are all the biggest bullies to ourselves. When something doesn’t go the way we expect it to, we get hard on ourselves. One thing that I urge you to try to do is to remember that you must not get hard on yourself during these times. Beating yourself up for whatever reason it may be will get you nowhere except keep you going even further downhill. 

I’ve noticed this to be especially prevalent in my early to mid-twenties and I think it’s pretty common around this age for most people. It’s the time in our lives when we are set free to really figure out who we are and what we are supposed to be doing with our lives. Every time we think we are getting closer to getting it figured out, something happens to throw us off track a little bit. 

When this started happening to me, I was thinking that I was the only one going through this. I just assumed that everyone else my age was getting things all figured out and they were happily progressing without any problems. When you think you’re the only one going through something, it’s very discouraging. 

Trust me, I know this very well. I spent about 3 years trying to find a job, getting another degree, revising my resume, countless applications & interviews and ended up getting fired from the job I finally got after just 5 weeks. Talk about discouraging! While it was frustrating and discouraging, I’ve come to realize that Getting Fired Was The Best Thing To Happen To Me!

The most important piece of advice that I received in terms of getting through this was to not beat myself up. If you can shift your perception on the situation to the best of your ability, you can see this in a whole new light.

Give yourself some grace here! If you want some extra tips, make sure you check out my blog on The Importance of Self-Care!

Avoiding facing your fears.

A lot of people don’t reach their full potential because they are letting fear win. They stay in their comfort zone forever because they think it’s better than what potentially could happen if they get uncomfy & take risks.

However, it is really important to understand that all of your dreams, success, best life is on the other side of that fear. It takes doing things that makes your heart feel like it’s going to beat out of your chest. It takes really stepping out of that comfort bubble, taking risks & doing things that truly scares you. If it scares you, you are probably on the right track.

What is something that you really want to do, but you know there is a possibility that it could take you to the next level?

Do that. Be okay with failing because that’s where growth happens.

Putting pressure on yourself to get everything done.

One of the most common questions that I get as a Life Coach is how to balance everything. How in the world are you supposed to get everything done in the day?!

The quick answer: You don’t. So try not to put the pressure on yourself to get all the things done. 

Don’t put the pressure on yourself to be a perfect parent, work 80hrs a week, cook 3 healthy meals a day, volunteer at all of your kids events, get in an hour an a half workout 5 times a week, have a solid social life, get 8 hours of sleep every night and be smiling all day everyday.

I teach creating a balanced lifestyle, but I don’t teach trying to balance every single little thing. Here’s the thing: I believe that there’s really only 3 things that you really want to balance at a time. How much better does 3 things sounds than ALLLL of the things?! So much better.. Not to mention more realistic and attainable. 

Don’t be afraid to ask for help for other things. Do you have a spouse that can help with meals and watching the kids? Can you get a meal delivery service for some of your meals during the week?

There are so many options to help you keep things under control. Don’t put the pressure on yourself to be perfect at balancing everything all the time. You are human. You have one life and you must live it to the fullest.

Also, you are doing a great job & deserve to be kind to yourself!

Saying mean things to yourself.

I saw a quote recently, I forget where & who said it but it has stuck with me and I think it is really important. It said something along the lines of:

“You talk to yourself the most. Make sure you are saying the right things.”

Inner dialogue is so important. 

We, especially us women are so hard on ourselves and so quick to beat ourselves up. Like complaining, your inner dialogue becomes automatic, but your subconscious always remembers. 

We are so quick to tear our bodies apart and tell ourselves how we have fallen short in different areas. We say things to ourselves that we would never say to someone else. 

As cliche as it sounds and as silly as it may sound, start paying attention to all the things that you say to yourself on a daily basis. You may be surprised by what you notice.

Living life based on what others want you to do.

As humans, we care a lot about what others think of us. It’s human nature because we literally need interaction and acceptance to survive. 

However, I’ve come to realize that it is really common for us to do things & live life based on what we think others want us to do. 

I wrote a post on Breaking Free From Society & Creating A Life You Love & I think you should check it out if this resonates with you. 

This is your life. You should live how YOU want to.

Comparing yourself to others/Getting jealous.

Comparing yourself to someone else is the fastest way to halt any possibility to get the most out of life. However, I understand that it is so much easier said than done to get rid of this comparison. 

Take yourself out of situations where you are going to compare yourself to others while you work on yourself. Once you take your power back from other people, that’s when the magic can really begin.

Avoiding doing things that you love.

Really sit and think about this for a moment. What are some things that you really love doing? What makes you really happy that you aren’t putting much- if any- attention to? 

This goes along with doing things based on what others think of you because you might be avoiding them because you are worried about what others may think of you. 

Seriously, sit down and really think about this. What do you really love that you aren’t doing right now? What makes you REALLY happy & feel alive?


Remember, this is YOUR life. Don’t hold yourself back. You are amazing & have so much to offer this world. Start living your life & go after your dreams. ❤

xx,
Jess

9 Simple Tips to Improve Your Life

My belief: how you feel about yourself, show up for yourself & what you choose to focus on determines what you get out of life. We all have the power within ourselves to get the most out of life, but we are often the ones holding ourselves back.

I believe the base foundation to getting the most out of life starts from within. It starts with challenging yourself & believing in yourself.

I believe that we are the ones holding ourselves back and we have the control to shift how we show up for ourselves & truly love our life. At the end of the day, what is the point of life if you don’t love it?

We have one shot at this life. 
We are all so lucky to be here. 
We have the power inside of us to really make an impact on the world & live life the way WE want to. 

Doesn’t that sound amazing? 

In this post, I am sharing my 9 simple tips that you can start implementing TODAY to start working toward living your best life ❤ Let’s dig in!

Create healthy habits

The more you take care of yourself, the better you will feel. 

These habits might look different for different people, but some ideas include (definitely not limited to): 

  • Moving your body
  • Feeding your body healthy foods
  • Picking up a book instead of watching so much TV
  • Making it a goal to park further away in the parking lot so you can get in extra steps

When you take the time to engage in some simple habits, you are more likely to start feeling better about yourself. Incorporating simple healthy habits throughout your day can make a HUGE impact on how you feel overall. 

Sometimes, it can often cause a ripple effect. Meaning, one simple habit is likely to lead to another, and another, and another. 

CREATE helpful ROUTINES

Create a morning routine  

We’ve all heard all about how setting a solid morning routine is incredibly important for starting the day. I don’t believe there’s one “perfect” morning routine universal for everyone. What works really well for me might not work for you and vice versa and that’s OK! But, I do think it’s important for everyone to set one for themselves & test out different strategies to figure out what that ideal morning routine looks like. 

The thing about routines is that they change often. They change with us, when certain life shifts happen. For me, it’s changed many times over the years & especially with starting my own business working from home.

Personally, I’m a BIG morning person. I’m definitely one of those “annoying morning people” that people like to complain about. I just think mornings are so peaceful, especially early mornings. I love getting up early before the sun and taking my time to get ready for the day because how I spend my mornings definitely sets the tone for how the rest of the day is going to be. 

Create an evening routine

I talk about this importance of self care & creating a solid morning routine, but having a solid night routine is just as important. Your night routine is important because it allows you to prepare for the next day!

After some trial & error with my night routine, I have figured out a routine that works for me and makes sure that I am getting the sleep I need & preparation that I need.

Journal

I talk about journaling often, but I do because I wholeheartedly believe in it. I believe in the therapeutic nature of getting everything out of your head and onto paper.

Many success stories & successful people include journaling constantly to get everything out of their subconscious & work through what is going on. 

This can help with working through any limiting beliefs you might have, what is bothering you right now. It can help you have breakthroughs & “aha!” moments. 

If you are struggling with what to write about, I wrote a post on 50 Journal Prompts For Self Reflection & Self Discovery that you might find helpful! Inside that post is also a free printable guide that you can download! ❤

So, grab your journal and get to writing!

Express gratitude daily

Expressing gratitude daily is something that I recently started incorporating into my routine and I have seen a huge difference in how I feel overall. Often, we are so used to going about our days complaining about things that we don’t have in our lives & getting frustrated with the inconveniences. But, taking the time everyday to list 3-5 things that you are thankful for can change your entire perception of what is going on.

When you start shifting your mindset & the perception around what you are focusing on, it will seriously change how you show up for yourself everyday.

I don’t just mean express the same obvious things every day- like your parents, friends, etc. Which are all great to be grateful for, but I mean challenging yourself to take the time to show gratitude for simply being alive, your healthy body, having access to clean water, the sun coming up this morning, even all of the road blocks & learning experiences. 

I personally love The Five Minute Journal!

I love this journal because it’s quick & gets right to the point. I’ve been using this journal for a couple years now and it’s really good for getting you in the habit of expressing gratitude.

You have prompts to write about at the start of the day and a reflection to do at the end of the day. The page starts off with a quote or a “weekly challenge”, followed by having you list 3 things you’re grateful for, 3 things that would make the day great and a daily affirmation.

Then, at the end of the day, you reflect on how the day went. Having you write about 3 things that went well and listing what would have made the day better. Even on those days that you feel didn’t go so well, this really helps to be able to find some positives in what you might think there aren’t any.

I love this journal & highly recommend you get your hands on it! ❤

Get rid of excuses

Ah, yes. Good ol’ excuses. We are constantly making excuses for ourselves, even when we don’t even notice it. 

  • “I don’t have time”
  • “I don’t have what it takes”
  • “I will never be able to be successful”
  • “I’m not pretty enough”
  • “I’m not good enough”
  • “Nothing ever works out for me”

Whether you want to believe it or not, those are all excuses. They are all excuses holding yourself back from living your life to the fullest. They are excuses that keep you right where you are.

In order to get the most out of life, you have to get rid of those constant excuses for not showing up fully for yourself.

Get rid of comparison to others

Comparing yourself to someone else is the fastest way to halt any possibility to get the most out of life. However, I understand that it is so much easier said than done to get rid of this comparison. 

Take yourself out of situations where you are going to compare yourself to others while you work on yourself. Once you can your power back from other people, that’s when they magic can really begin.

Face your fears

A lot of people don’t reach their full potential because they are letting fear win. They stay in their comfort zone forever because they think it’s better than what potentially could happen if they get uncomfy.

What is something that you really want to do, but you know there is a possibility that it could take you to the next level?

Do that. Be okay with failing because that’s where growth happens. 

Set attainable goals

Setting goals is something that I have always struggled with because I wasn’t doing it right. I always focused on the big picture goal- the goal that may or may not be in my control. 

When you break your goals down into actionable steps that you can start taking, it’s so much easier to actually reach your goals and feel really good about it. 

What can you start doing TODAY to get you to that goal?

Pay attention to what you focus on

PROTECT YOUR ENERGY! Create an awareness around where you are choosing to place your energy. Why are you focusing on that particular thing? Is it helpful? Does it make you feel good or does it make you feel icky?

Mindset & perception are both really important in living your best life. Protect your energy & start creating an awareness around where you are focusing your energy. 

You will probably be really surprised how much you are placing your energy in unhelpful places. 


YOU have the power inside of yourself to get the most out of this life. 
YOU deserve it, babe ❤ I hope you found this to be helpful!

Join The Mindset Movement for more in-depth information & personalized plan for you!

xx,
Jess

The Importance of Celebrating Accomplishments

Over the last couple years, since I graduated from college in 2015, I’ve constantly felt like I’ve failed- unaccomplished, not good enough, not smart enough. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t seem to get to where I was hoping to be.

I don’t know about you, but I often find myself focusing on the things that I’m NOT doing/ haven’t accomplished. It’s so easy to focus on the negatives and what we aren’t doing in our lives or haven’t been able to accomplish in our lives.

I realized the career path I envisioned myself in was not for me and I really struggled to figure out what I was supposed to be doing, I started struggling with my mental health, I got fired from a job I thought was my “big break” (you can read more about this in Getting Fired Was The Best Thing to Happen To Me). I was 25 years old, still living with my parents and found myself without a job & not knowing where I was supposed to go next. Due to these reasons, I’ve considered the last couple years to be “dysfunctional”. 

It’s really discouraging when you think that nothing you are doing is working. Everyone around you seems to be accomplishing all of these amazing things and you’re over here struggling to do anything.

Until I thought…

Have I really “failed” at accomplishing anything?

What if what I was considering as failures are actually steps to getting me closer to success?

What if I’ve been so focused on thinking about “failures”, that I have actually been ignoring all of my accomplishments?

The first week of the new year, I found myself journaling about my accomplishments in the last decade and it opened my eyes to everything that I was able to accomplish, while I had been focusing on all of the things I was “failing” at. I realized that while I was focusing on all of the things that I hadn’t done, I was neglecting to really celebrate all of the things that I was able to do.

This exercise was really powerful for me because it made me shift my mindset away from thinking about everything that had gone wrong, to being proud of myself for all of the things that I was able to do and accomplish in the last decade.

I also recently filled out my spending & income sheet for 2019. I totaled all of my spending per month & income per month for when the time comes to file taxes. While I was calculating my income for each month, I decided to total the amount that I made in all of 2019. I’m not going to say the amount, but let’s just say that most couple would cringe at how little I made. 

However, I’m choosing to celebrate the fact that I made the money without knowing what the heck I’m doing. I’m trying to figure it out on my own. I experienced extreme burnout and exhaustion (you can read more about this in Getting Over Extreme Burnout). I was confused and unsure if I was doing what I was meant to be doing with my life. 

I’m now a couple months into this new year with new knowledge and a new energy and understanding about what I’m doing in my business. I have the tools and the knowledge needed to take the next step. 

Your mindset is EVERYTHING. What you choose to do with information is EVERYTHING. 

So, let me ask you, do you ever take the time to really celebrate those small “wins” along your journey? Really take the time to celebrate yourself, your business/life, all the hard work you do & have done, the sacrifices, the blood, sweat & tears you shed to get you to where you are today?

We get so caught up in wanting to achieve the bigger goal, that we don’t take the time to really celebrate all of the things that happen along the journey that leads us to that end goal.

But, I think it’s important to really take the time to celebrate and be proud of ourselves for how hard we’ve worked and all that we’ve been able to accomplish. 

When we think that we aren’t making any progress, it’s discouraging. When we focus on what we are failing at, it’s easy to get down on ourselves and give up.

Here are some tips to consider when trying to adjust your mindset:

Celebrate all of the wins

I say it’s important to celebrate all of the “wins” that even seem to be so small. Things that some people think are comparable to a “participation trophy”. I say, celebrating those things. Even something that seems as simple as celebrating getting out of bed in the morning. It’s something that seems so simple, but for some people, depending on what an individual is going through, that can be a step forward.  

CELEBRATE IT ALLLLL!!

Pay attention to your inner dialogue

Celebrating wins and accomplishments is important in making sure that you are continuing to move forward. Our self-talk and inner dialogue is so important in how we feel and how we show up for ourselves. 

We tend to be bullies to ourselves and are incredibly hard on ourselves. It’s like not matter what we do, it’s never enough. What you tell yourself is incredibly important for making sure that you are continuing to move forward. If you are constantly telling yourself that you are a “failure” and haven’t been able to accomplish anything, then you really aren’t going to get very far. Be kind to yourself & really start paying attention to your inner dialogue!

Forget what everyone else thinks

I say, who cares what everyone thinks. Write down every single thing you are proud of yourself for and take the time to actually CELEBRATE. You can read more about my own journey in Getting through a quarter life crisis.

In my recent post on Breaking Free From Society & Creating A Life You Love, I talk about forgetting about societal generalizations to start creating a life you actually LOVE living. We live and create a life based on what society says we should be doing & I’m calling BS on that. We all have special talents & traits that makes us unique and I think we deserve to CELEBRATE that uniqueness.

Forget about if society says your accomplishments aren’t worth celebrating. Forget that. YOU deserve to be celebrated- every single little thing you’ve done.

I have the knowledge- YOU have the knowledge, WE just need to take ACTION!

So, make sure that you are celebrating all of those “wins” throughout your journey, whatever that looks like for YOU! Those seemingly smaller “wins” are going to add up and could be potentially life-changing if you allow them.

Take the time to really think about and celebrate everything that you have done in life so far, and start celebrating them as they come. You may be surprised at how much you’ve actually been able to accomplish!

I would LOVE to support you along your journey! ❤ YOU GOT THIS!


I talk more about celebrating wins in my 5-Day Better Mindset Course!

THIS COURSE TEACHES YOU:

> how to stay consistent & monitor your mental, emotional & physical well-being
> how to shift your mindset to focus on what you’ve been able to accomplish vs. “failures”
> how to shift your mindset to focus on everything going right vs. everything that goes wrong

See you there!

xx

5 Days To A Better Mindset

I am a big believer in the fact that your mindset dictates everything in your life. Your mindset impacts how you feel physically & show up in the world, and how you show up for yourself altogether.

I have struggled with my own mindset over the last couple years, feeling frustrated and unsure of how to get myself out of the funk that I was in. After testing out different strategies, hiring some coaches and doing TONS of inner work, I’ve been able to figure out how to master my mindset.

Now, I want to help you master YOURS.

I completed a 5-Day Better Mindset Challenge in my private Facebook group, sharing a video training & assignment on what I think is really important in order to master mindset.

Since the women in my group had such a great experience, I have taken the videos and turned them into a course!

This course teaches you:

> how to stay consistent & monitor your mental, emotional & physical well-being
> how to shift your mindset to focus on what you’ve been able to accomplish vs. “failures”
> how to shift your mindset to focus on everything going right vs. everything that goes wrong

What’s included in the course:

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is better-mindset-course.png

DAY 1:

My strategy for monitoring my mental, emotional & physical well-being

DAY 2:

Focusing on your accomplishments vs. your failures

DAY 3:

Shifting your mindset to everything you are grateful for

DAY 4:

Shifting your mindset away from complaining & pinpointing the triggers

DAY 5:

Start manifesting your future by focusing on actionable steps towards your goals


Like I already mentioned, the videos in these training are from a challenge I completed on Facebook live in my Facebook community. The information included in this training are what I believe to be essential tools to mastering your mindset to really start showing up in your life!

ARE YOU READY TO TRANSFORM YOUR MINDSET?!

Don’t miss out on my other free trainings inside of my free Facebook community!

>>Strong, confident & empowered women<<

In this group, you will find daily inspiration, encouragement, find yourself in a community of like-minded women who strive to accomplish the same things and an opportunity to work with yours truly directly. ❤

I hope to see you there!


You can also check out my other blog posts that I think you might be interested in:

The Importance of Self-Care

Tips For When You’re Not Feeling Motivated

A lot can happen in just ONE YEAR!

5 Steps For Getting Back On Track & Shifting Your Mindset

Getting Over Extreme Burnout

My 8 Step Process to Overcoming Depression

Conquer your mindset, you can conquer your life! ❤ You got this!

xx