Simple tips to have more confidence in yourself

Confidence is something that all of us, especially us women wish we had more of. We are constantly comparing ourselves to others who seem to have tons of confidence & we wish we were more like that. We wish we could just live confidently & authentically.

Here’s the thing- YOU CAN! You absolutely have all the power inside of you to reach that level of confidence that you desire. There are just a couple tips that I have to help you gain that confidence!

PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU TELL YOURSELF

The most prominent characteristic of someone who is confident is that they believe in themselves. When you believe in yourself, you are more likely to carry yourself more confidently than when you don’t believe in yourself. It seems simple, but this is definitely the very first thing to do when trying to live more confidently. But, this doesn’t come without training your brain to stop saying all of those mean things to yourself. 

Make it a goal to start creating awareness around all the things that you say to yourself & try to challenge yourself to replace negative self talk with a positive one. Once you start to train your brain to think of yourself more positively, the more likely you are to start believing in yourself & living more confidently.

CREATE HEALTHY HABITS

The more you take care of yourself, the better you will feel. 

At the end of the day, how you treat yourself & your body will have a major impact on how you feel about yourself overall. Did you know that the food that you eat has an impact on how you feel? On your mental health? So, if you are eating crappy food all the time, you are probably going to feel crappy. The result of feeling crappy often leads to beating yourself up, getting angry at yourself, self sabotage, not believing in yourself to be able to do certain things, etc, etc. 

Creating healthy habits into your lifestyle will have such a major impact on your life & how you feel about yourself, you might be surprised! When you take care of yourself, the better you will feel and the more confident energy you will put out into the world. These habits might look different for different people, but some ideas include (definitely not limited to): 

  • Moving your body
  • Feeding your body healthy foods
  • Picking up a book instead of watching so much TV
  • Making it a goal to park further away in the parking lot so you can get in extra steps

When you take the time to engage in some simple habits, you are more likely to start feeling better about yourself. Incorporating simple healthy habits throughout your day can make a HUGE impact on how you feel overall. 

Sometimes, it can often cause a ripple effect. Meaning, one simple habit is likely to lead to another, and another, and another. 

SET THE RIGHT GOALS & ACTIONABLE STEPS TO ACHIEVE THEM

Here’s the thing, I’m actually not much of a fan of setting goals, but I have worked hard on creating more confidence around my ability to achieve all of my goals & aspirations. 

Setting goals is something that we all know is very important to making sure that you are continuing to move forward, staying focused, but if you don’t approach them right, they won’t work right. When you don’t think you are achieving your goals, it really affects your overall confidence in yourself.

When I used to set goals, I only focused on the big picture & often on things that were not in my control. Things like, getting a job, making enough money to move out of my parents house, etc. These things are great goals to have, but achieving those goals are in the hands of someone else. Instead of focusing on the big picture, you have to break it down into things that you are in control of. Like, making it a goal to apply to 10 jobs a day & ask for feedback if you don’t get the job. 

When you break your goals down into actionable steps that you can start taking, it’s so much easier to actually reach your goals and feel really good about it. When you see that you are reaching your goals, you have so much more confidence in yourself & your abilities!

What can you start doing TODAY to get you to that goal?

FACE YOUR FEARS & START TAKING ACTION 

One of the most important things that you have to do in order to gain more confidence in yourself is to start facing your fears. Fears in terms of something that you know you need to do in order to gain confidence in yourself. Something like, public speaking or taking the leap to start your own business. 

In order to have more confidence in yourself, you have to start getting uncomfy & doing things that make you want to jump out of your skin. Trust me, every single time that I have done something that scares the crap out of me, I not only grow from the experience, but I gain so much more confidence in myself & my abilities.  

So, what is something that you really want to do, but you know there is a possibility that it could take you to the next level?

Do that. Be okay with failing because that’s where growth happens.

Related: 9 Simple Tips to Improve Your Life

SEE THE OPPORTUNITIES & LEARNING EXPERIENCES IN FAILURES

When you start facing your fears & start taking scary action, you are more likely to fail & fall on your face quite a bit. That’s not to scare you or anything, but to empower you. There is such a negative connotation with failing, because it means that you didn’t succeed. 

Every failure comes with a learning experience. When you fail, you get uncomfortable, but you stand back up knowing more than you did before and you keep going. When you keep going, you start to feel more confident in yourself. It might be a journey, but when you look back at all that you have been able to accomplish, it really puts things into perspective about how much you have truly accomplished.

I talk about this in my post about how Getting Fired Was The Best Thing To Happen To Me. Getting fired is often seen as a bad thing, right? It’s seen as a “failure”. But, I took that learning experience and turned it into building my own business because I learned that I wasn’t meant to be proving myself to Corporate America. 

You can let your failures hold you down & discourage you, or you can see them as a learning experience & allow growth to happen from it. It might feel crappy for a little bit, but when you are able to shift this perception, it is incredibly empowering. 

JOURNAL ABOUT YOUR STRENGTHS, YOUR EXPERIENCES & WHAT YOU LOVE ABOUT YOURSELF 

I often write about & preach about the benefits of journaling & I do because I truly believe in the therapeutic nature of it. In addition to practicing positive self talk, it’s also important to write about everything that is going on. 

Write it all down! Get yourself a nice journal & make it a habit to write in it daily. Write down everything that is going right now- what you love about yourself, what you are happy about, what is bothering you, what you are going to do to continue moving forward. If you don’t deal with the emotions that you are feeling & also take the time to acknowledge & celebrate yourself, you are going to continue to stay stuck.

Many success stories & successful people include journaling constantly in their daily routine in order to get everything out of their subconscious & work through what is going on. It’s something that you have to do! 

Journaling can even help with working through any limiting beliefs you might have, what is bothering you right now. It can help you have breakthroughs & “aha!” moments. 

If you are struggling with what to write about, I wrote a post on 50 Journal Prompts For Self Reflection & Self Discovery that you might find helpful! Inside that post is also a free printable guide that you can download! ❤

STOP COMPARING YOURSELF & YOUR SUCCESS TO OTHERS 

Here’s the thing that I really want you to think about. We are all on this journey of life- we’re all different & in different points of our journey. We have all had different life experiences that have lead us to where each of us are today, which means that we are all going to be at different point of our life. When you are comparing yourself to someone else, where they are, you are sabotaging your beliefs about yourself. You are looking at them and thinking, “why isn’t that me?” It’s not you because you aren’t them!

If you find that you are having trouble not comparing yourself, stop following certain people on social media- even if it’s friends or family. It doesn’t mean that you don’t care about them, it’s just something that you need to do in order to stop the habit. 

Once you can your power back from other people, that’s when they magic can really begin.

I have gotten to a point where I actually feel EMPOWERED & MOTIVATED when I see others succeed. I absolutely LOVE seeing others, especially women, absolutely crushing it. It’s a form of motivation for myself & it lights a fire under me to continue working on myself and my own goals. 

This ultimately helps me feel better, more confident in myself because I know that if they can do it, so can I. You have to b e l i e v e in yourself!


At the end of the day, confidence is something that we all want. We all want to go out and live life to the absolute fullest. I got myself fired up writing this post & I hope you got fired up reading it!

YOU have the power inside of you to get the most out of life. Confidence isn’t something that only some people are lucky enough to have. Sometimes, it takes a lot of inner work & lifestyle changes to get to that point, but it’s something so worth it. 

You have this one life to live, don’t hold yourself back from getting the most out of it! ❤

xx,
-Jess

9 things to stop doing to get the most out of life

I’ve said this many times, but we all the the power inside of ourselves to get the most out of life & reach our fullest potential. While we all have this potential, we are often the ones holding our own selves back.

I’m very passionate about living life to the fullest because we all have this one life to live. We have this one life and we are the ones holding ourselves back from getting the most out of this life.

Over the last couple of years, I have come to realize all of the things that I am in control of & how I have been focusing on the wrong things. In this post, I am laying out 9 of the most prevalent things that I bet you are probably doing, that you should probably stop doing so you can start getting the most out of life. ❤

Making excuses.

We are constantly making excuses for ourselves, even when we don’t even notice it. Do you ever catch yourself saying things like:

  • “I don’t have time”
  • “I don’t have what it takes”
  • “I will never be able to be successful”
  • “I’m not pretty enough”
  • “I’m not good enough”
  • “Nothing ever works out for me”

Whether you want to believe it or not, those are all excuses. They are all excuses holding yourself back from living your life to the fullest. They are excuses that keep you right where you are. In order to get the most out of life, you have to get rid of those constant excuses for not showing up fully for yourself.

Try to catch yourself making these excuses. You are probably saying them so much that you just believe it and don’t even consider it to be an excuse. But, it is! Get rid of those excuses & start taking ACTION on your life & reaching those goals of yours!

Complaining all the time.

This is a big one and something that I think it really important to try to monitor in order to start getting the most out of life. Constantly complaining about every little inconvenience really trains your brain to go into this “woe-is-me” mentality & will also have you stressing out about things that really don’t need your energy. Once I started taking the time to create an awareness around all of the things I was complaining about throughout each day, it became really clear why I was feeling so frustrated all the time. These things are often not in our control & honestly, not worth getting all worked up about.

Really take the time to think about all the things that you are complaining about throughout the day. 

Things like,

  • Too many people at the grocery store
  • The person in front of you driving too slow
  • Food service is slow

There are just so many things that you are probably complaining about to yourself that you don’t even know about. But I think that it is really important to create an awareness around everything you are complaining about because it does start to weigh heavy on your subconscious. You start doing it automatically without even knowing that you are doing it and it’s going to start making you not feel so good about yourself. 

So, create an awareness around all the things that you catch yourself complaining about. Especially with what others are doing and create alternative perceptions. Even if the other person isn’t doing something for that reason, it really makes you feel so much better overall. 

This is definitely so much easier said than done, but creating the awareness is the first step!

Beating yourself up.

We are all the biggest bullies to ourselves. When something doesn’t go the way we expect it to, we get hard on ourselves. One thing that I urge you to try to do is to remember that you must not get hard on yourself during these times. Beating yourself up for whatever reason it may be will get you nowhere except keep you going even further downhill. 

I’ve noticed this to be especially prevalent in my early to mid-twenties and I think it’s pretty common around this age for most people. It’s the time in our lives when we are set free to really figure out who we are and what we are supposed to be doing with our lives. Every time we think we are getting closer to getting it figured out, something happens to throw us off track a little bit. 

When this started happening to me, I was thinking that I was the only one going through this. I just assumed that everyone else my age was getting things all figured out and they were happily progressing without any problems. When you think you’re the only one going through something, it’s very discouraging. 

Trust me, I know this very well. I spent about 3 years trying to find a job, getting another degree, revising my resume, countless applications & interviews and ended up getting fired from the job I finally got after just 5 weeks. Talk about discouraging! While it was frustrating and discouraging, I’ve come to realize that Getting Fired Was The Best Thing To Happen To Me!

The most important piece of advice that I received in terms of getting through this was to not beat myself up. If you can shift your perception on the situation to the best of your ability, you can see this in a whole new light.

Give yourself some grace here! If you want some extra tips, make sure you check out my blog on The Importance of Self-Care!

Avoiding facing your fears.

A lot of people don’t reach their full potential because they are letting fear win. They stay in their comfort zone forever because they think it’s better than what potentially could happen if they get uncomfy & take risks.

However, it is really important to understand that all of your dreams, success, best life is on the other side of that fear. It takes doing things that makes your heart feel like it’s going to beat out of your chest. It takes really stepping out of that comfort bubble, taking risks & doing things that truly scares you. If it scares you, you are probably on the right track.

What is something that you really want to do, but you know there is a possibility that it could take you to the next level?

Do that. Be okay with failing because that’s where growth happens.

Putting pressure on yourself to get everything done.

One of the most common questions that I get as a Life Coach is how to balance everything. How in the world are you supposed to get everything done in the day?!

The quick answer: You don’t. So try not to put the pressure on yourself to get all the things done. 

Don’t put the pressure on yourself to be a perfect parent, work 80hrs a week, cook 3 healthy meals a day, volunteer at all of your kids events, get in an hour an a half workout 5 times a week, have a solid social life, get 8 hours of sleep every night and be smiling all day everyday.

I teach creating a balanced lifestyle, but I don’t teach trying to balance every single little thing. Here’s the thing: I believe that there’s really only 3 things that you really want to balance at a time. How much better does 3 things sounds than ALLLL of the things?! So much better.. Not to mention more realistic and attainable. 

Don’t be afraid to ask for help for other things. Do you have a spouse that can help with meals and watching the kids? Can you get a meal delivery service for some of your meals during the week?

There are so many options to help you keep things under control. Don’t put the pressure on yourself to be perfect at balancing everything all the time. You are human. You have one life and you must live it to the fullest.

Also, you are doing a great job & deserve to be kind to yourself!

Saying mean things to yourself.

I saw a quote recently, I forget where & who said it but it has stuck with me and I think it is really important. It said something along the lines of:

“You talk to yourself the most. Make sure you are saying the right things.”

Inner dialogue is so important. 

We, especially us women are so hard on ourselves and so quick to beat ourselves up. Like complaining, your inner dialogue becomes automatic, but your subconscious always remembers. 

We are so quick to tear our bodies apart and tell ourselves how we have fallen short in different areas. We say things to ourselves that we would never say to someone else. 

As cliche as it sounds and as silly as it may sound, start paying attention to all the things that you say to yourself on a daily basis. You may be surprised by what you notice.

Living life based on what others want you to do.

As humans, we care a lot about what others think of us. It’s human nature because we literally need interaction and acceptance to survive. 

However, I’ve come to realize that it is really common for us to do things & live life based on what we think others want us to do. 

I wrote a post on Breaking Free From Society & Creating A Life You Love & I think you should check it out if this resonates with you. 

This is your life. You should live how YOU want to.

Comparing yourself to others/Getting jealous.

Comparing yourself to someone else is the fastest way to halt any possibility to get the most out of life. However, I understand that it is so much easier said than done to get rid of this comparison. 

Take yourself out of situations where you are going to compare yourself to others while you work on yourself. Once you take your power back from other people, that’s when the magic can really begin.

Avoiding doing things that you love.

Really sit and think about this for a moment. What are some things that you really love doing? What makes you really happy that you aren’t putting much- if any- attention to? 

This goes along with doing things based on what others think of you because you might be avoiding them because you are worried about what others may think of you. 

Seriously, sit down and really think about this. What do you really love that you aren’t doing right now? What makes you REALLY happy & feel alive?


Remember, this is YOUR life. Don’t hold yourself back. You are amazing & have so much to offer this world. Start living your life & go after your dreams. ❤

xx,
Jess

9 Simple Tips to Improve Your Life

My belief: how you feel about yourself, show up for yourself & what you choose to focus on determines what you get out of life. We all have the power within ourselves to get the most out of life, but we are often the ones holding ourselves back.

I believe the base foundation to getting the most out of life starts from within. It starts with challenging yourself & believing in yourself.

I believe that we are the ones holding ourselves back and we have the control to shift how we show up for ourselves & truly love our life. At the end of the day, what is the point of life if you don’t love it?

We have one shot at this life. 
We are all so lucky to be here. 
We have the power inside of us to really make an impact on the world & live life the way WE want to. 

Doesn’t that sound amazing? 

In this post, I am sharing my 9 simple tips that you can start implementing TODAY to start working toward living your best life ❤ Let’s dig in!

Create healthy habits

The more you take care of yourself, the better you will feel. 

These habits might look different for different people, but some ideas include (definitely not limited to): 

  • Moving your body
  • Feeding your body healthy foods
  • Picking up a book instead of watching so much TV
  • Making it a goal to park further away in the parking lot so you can get in extra steps

When you take the time to engage in some simple habits, you are more likely to start feeling better about yourself. Incorporating simple healthy habits throughout your day can make a HUGE impact on how you feel overall. 

Sometimes, it can often cause a ripple effect. Meaning, one simple habit is likely to lead to another, and another, and another. 

CREATE helpful ROUTINES

Create a morning routine  

We’ve all heard all about how setting a solid morning routine is incredibly important for starting the day. I don’t believe there’s one “perfect” morning routine universal for everyone. What works really well for me might not work for you and vice versa and that’s OK! But, I do think it’s important for everyone to set one for themselves & test out different strategies to figure out what that ideal morning routine looks like. 

The thing about routines is that they change often. They change with us, when certain life shifts happen. For me, it’s changed many times over the years & especially with starting my own business working from home.

Personally, I’m a BIG morning person. I’m definitely one of those “annoying morning people” that people like to complain about. I just think mornings are so peaceful, especially early mornings. I love getting up early before the sun and taking my time to get ready for the day because how I spend my mornings definitely sets the tone for how the rest of the day is going to be. 

Create an evening routine

I talk about this importance of self care & creating a solid morning routine, but having a solid night routine is just as important. Your night routine is important because it allows you to prepare for the next day!

After some trial & error with my night routine, I have figured out a routine that works for me and makes sure that I am getting the sleep I need & preparation that I need.

Journal

I talk about journaling often, but I do because I wholeheartedly believe in it. I believe in the therapeutic nature of getting everything out of your head and onto paper.

Many success stories & successful people include journaling constantly to get everything out of their subconscious & work through what is going on. 

This can help with working through any limiting beliefs you might have, what is bothering you right now. It can help you have breakthroughs & “aha!” moments. 

If you are struggling with what to write about, I wrote a post on 50 Journal Prompts For Self Reflection & Self Discovery that you might find helpful! Inside that post is also a free printable guide that you can download! ❤

So, grab your journal and get to writing!

Express gratitude daily

Expressing gratitude daily is something that I recently started incorporating into my routine and I have seen a huge difference in how I feel overall. Often, we are so used to going about our days complaining about things that we don’t have in our lives & getting frustrated with the inconveniences. But, taking the time everyday to list 3-5 things that you are thankful for can change your entire perception of what is going on.

When you start shifting your mindset & the perception around what you are focusing on, it will seriously change how you show up for yourself everyday.

I don’t just mean express the same obvious things every day- like your parents, friends, etc. Which are all great to be grateful for, but I mean challenging yourself to take the time to show gratitude for simply being alive, your healthy body, having access to clean water, the sun coming up this morning, even all of the road blocks & learning experiences. 

I personally love The Five Minute Journal!

I love this journal because it’s quick & gets right to the point. I’ve been using this journal for a couple years now and it’s really good for getting you in the habit of expressing gratitude.

You have prompts to write about at the start of the day and a reflection to do at the end of the day. The page starts off with a quote or a “weekly challenge”, followed by having you list 3 things you’re grateful for, 3 things that would make the day great and a daily affirmation.

Then, at the end of the day, you reflect on how the day went. Having you write about 3 things that went well and listing what would have made the day better. Even on those days that you feel didn’t go so well, this really helps to be able to find some positives in what you might think there aren’t any.

I love this journal & highly recommend you get your hands on it! ❤

Get rid of excuses

Ah, yes. Good ol’ excuses. We are constantly making excuses for ourselves, even when we don’t even notice it. 

  • “I don’t have time”
  • “I don’t have what it takes”
  • “I will never be able to be successful”
  • “I’m not pretty enough”
  • “I’m not good enough”
  • “Nothing ever works out for me”

Whether you want to believe it or not, those are all excuses. They are all excuses holding yourself back from living your life to the fullest. They are excuses that keep you right where you are.

In order to get the most out of life, you have to get rid of those constant excuses for not showing up fully for yourself.

Get rid of comparison to others

Comparing yourself to someone else is the fastest way to halt any possibility to get the most out of life. However, I understand that it is so much easier said than done to get rid of this comparison. 

Take yourself out of situations where you are going to compare yourself to others while you work on yourself. Once you can your power back from other people, that’s when they magic can really begin.

Face your fears

A lot of people don’t reach their full potential because they are letting fear win. They stay in their comfort zone forever because they think it’s better than what potentially could happen if they get uncomfy.

What is something that you really want to do, but you know there is a possibility that it could take you to the next level?

Do that. Be okay with failing because that’s where growth happens. 

Set attainable goals

Setting goals is something that I have always struggled with because I wasn’t doing it right. I always focused on the big picture goal- the goal that may or may not be in my control. 

When you break your goals down into actionable steps that you can start taking, it’s so much easier to actually reach your goals and feel really good about it. 

What can you start doing TODAY to get you to that goal?

Pay attention to what you focus on

PROTECT YOUR ENERGY! Create an awareness around where you are choosing to place your energy. Why are you focusing on that particular thing? Is it helpful? Does it make you feel good or does it make you feel icky?

Mindset & perception are both really important in living your best life. Protect your energy & start creating an awareness around where you are focusing your energy. 

You will probably be really surprised how much you are placing your energy in unhelpful places. 


YOU have the power inside of yourself to get the most out of this life. 
YOU deserve it, babe ❤ I hope you found this to be helpful!

Join The Mindset Movement for more in-depth information & personalized plan for you!

xx,
Jess

What I’ve learned during lockdown

I have to admit, being in lockdown for 2 months during the COVID-19 outbreak has taught me a lot. At a time where life seemed to be moving so fast, always being busy, we have been forced out of our routines & to deal with something that we never thought we would ever have to deal with.

It’s been a difficult time for everyone. Having to adjust to the “new normal” was difficult for everyone. Now that we are on our way out of this craziness, I’ve done some reflection. 

This time has taught me a lot of valuable lessons. While I wish these lessons didn’t have to happen due to a global pandemic, my perception of daily life has been shifted. Things that used to matter to me, don’t matter anymore & things that I never paid much attention to are getting my greatest gratitude. 
Related: Self Care & Activities During Quarantine, Tips for working from home, Staying on track while stuck at home during quarantine, My Morning Routine During Quarantine


Here’s what I’ve learned during this time: 

NOT TO BE so RIGID WITH MY ROUTINES

I am a very routine-oriented person. Always have been, probably always will be. I rely so much on my routine that when I get knocked out out my routine, it’s really hard to get back. 

Like everyone else, my routines had to be shifted. I was no longer able to go to the gym in the morning, work on my own schedule at home by myself, free to run errands when I wanted without much hassle. 

At first, it was really hard. But, after some time I realized that maybe it’s a good thing that I was forced out of my routine so that I can experience other things. Do I prefer my routine? Yes, of course. But, I am now understanding that I don’t have to be so rigid. That I am completely capable of functioning without being strictly in that routine. 

I learned that I am now able to get in a workout at home in the afternoon if I can’t go to the gym in the morning or feel like I need to sleep in. Before, I was in the mindset that if I don’t workout early in the morning, there is no way that a workout is going to happen at all. 
Related: How/ Why I Go To The Gym At 5AM, 3 Tips for Early Morning Workouts

APPRECIATION FOR THE LITTLE THINGS

There are so many things that I have realized that I took advantage of, not even realizing how much I should be appreciating them.

Things like:

  • going to the gym
  • hugs
  • handshakes
  • running errands
  • toilet paper (lol)
  • going out to dinner
  • hanging out with friends/family
  • being able to be face-to-face with someone
  • getting my hair cut

These things that I once thought were no big deal are now something that I cherish. Since it’s all been taken away for a period of time, it carries so much meaning. So many things to be grateful for. 

I’m simply just appreciating all of the little things that I am now realizing mean so much. There’s nothing more powerful.

MOST PEOPLE ARE GOOD

Despite all the bad news we’ve been hearing and are used to hearing, I’ve heard some of the most amazing stories. 

Usually when you turn on the news, it’s full of bad news. But, I’ve heard amazing stories of people going out of their way to help others who are struggling, people are getting creative to make sure that birthdays and other celebrations are special. People are just going above & beyond to make sure that they are doing what they can to make sure everyone gets through this time.



During a time when things feel so crazy, odd, out of control- things have slowed down. Even though it’s uncomfortable, maybe it’s a good thing. Maybe it’s necessary. Maybe this time to get knocked out of our routine and into uncomfortable situations is what we needed.

I’m hoping that when things start getting back to normal, we all start enjoying the little things in life. For the little things are what makes life so amazing.

What has this unprecedented time taught you?!

xx
jess

Journal Prompts for Self Reflection & Self Discovery

Journaling has become a really important part of my self-care & self-discovery over the years. Especially during stressful times, journaling has helped me with getting everything out of my head and onto paper. I talk about how journaling has helped with my mental health in my post about The Importance of Self Care & The Power of Journaling

I truly believe in the healing & therapeutic nature of journaling. While I talk about journaling a lot and how helpful it can be, I also understand that you might not know what to write about. I actually completed a journal prompt challenge in my Facebook group throughout April.

The ladies in my Facebook group loved this challenge and mentioned that the prompts helped them with discovering more about themselves and how to better handle stressful situations. Being able to understand more about yourself can be helpful in making sure that you are prepared, ultimately helping you to be able to move forward.

Here are some journal prompts to try out if you are looking to get into journaling and need some guidance:

  1. What limiting beliefs are holding me back?

  2. What habit would I like to break?

  3. How can I love myself more daily?

  4. What do I need to get off my chest today?

  5. How do my worries affect my daily life?

  6. On a scale to 1-10, my mental health is at a ___ because ____

  7. If I could achieve anything in life, what would it be?

  8. How am I feeling today?

  9. What brings me the most peace and balance in my life?

  10. What was my biggest learning moment this week?

  11. How can I be more kind to myself?

  12. What 3 things am I looking forward to this week & why?

  13. I am strong because…

  14. When times get tough, I want to remember that…

  15. What makes me happiest?

  16. What inspires me right now?

  17. What can I do to start taking better care of myself?

  18. What are my stress triggers?

  19. What is something I need to let go of? Why do I think I’m holding onto it?

  20. What would life be like if my stressors weren’t present?

  21. What are alternative ways to handle my stress?

  22. What do I think my mission in life is?

  23. How do I react to negative feelings?

  24. What do I love about myself?

  25. What obstacles have I overcome?

  26. What keeps me motivated?

  27. Where am I putting in too much energy?

  28. Where am I putting in not enough energy?

  29. What are 5 moments in my life when I was truly happy?

  30. What lessons have I learned?

  31. How are you feeling right now? What emotions come up?

  32. List everything that you are worried about right now

  33. What do you look forward to everyday?

  34. How do I handle stressful situations?

  35. If I could achieve anything in life, what would it be?

  36. What do I feel like my life is missing and how can I get more of what I need?

  37. Where do I want to be in 5 years?

  38. When am I the happiest version of me?

  39. What are 3 negative mindsets I need to let go of?

  40. Am I doing all that I can to reach my goals?

  41. What steps can I take to be the most confident version of myself?

  42. If I could be anything in the world, what would it be?

  43. How would I describe the perfect day?

  44. I forgive myself for…

  45. I deserve happiness because…

  46. What are 5 things I’m proud of myself for?

  47. What is most important to me right now?

  48. What are my biggest fears?

  49. What is my favorite quality about myself?

  50. In the next month, I want to…

Want these journal prompts in a printable guide?!


I am also a big advocate for expressing gratitude everyday. I started using The Five Minute Journal 4 days a week in addition to my journaling and I absolutely love it!

I love this journal because it’s quick & gets right to the point. I’ve been using this journal for a couple years now and it’s really good for getting you in the habit of expressing gratitude.

Practicing gratitude will help you with your mindset & what you are focusing on everyday. Focusing what you do have and what you are still in control of. When you focus on what you still have & what you are still in control of, you are more likely to make healthier choices & be better able to show up for yourself!

I hope you found this to be helpful. ❤ The prompts included in this post can be so incredibly transformative & help you understand more about yourself!

xx
-Jess

I Wrote A Letter To My Future Self

Have you ever wanted to reach a level of success that you thought was out of your reach? Yeah, I did too. I think most of us just think that some people are capable of success, being rich, thriving and living life. 

During my first year of starting my own business, I was exposed to a LOT of amazing women. I mean, A LOT. I’ve been able to connect with so many amazing women that I started to realize my true potential and that maybe I was capable of reaching success. 

During this process, I started learning more about the power of manifestation. It was a word that I heard before, but I never really knew what it meant. I started noticing that just about everyone in the coaching world was talking about the power of manifestation and how it could be used to reach success. 

I’ve also started reading books that talked about this as well. I’ve read so many success stories where people used the power of manifestation to reach a level of success they didn’t think was possible for them. They started achieving more, leaving all of their doubts behind. 

It honestly sounds like something that just isn’t possible. I doubted it for a long time, kind of just ignoring the concept altogether. I would brush off the idea that I could potentially reach a level of success that I could only dream of. I just thought it was kind of silly and that just wasn’t for me. Sure, I wanted it, but there’s no way I could do that. Just isn’t possible. 

I’ve heard about the power of manifestation so much, that I finally started getting intrigued. What if..just what if… I could do it myself as well. What if, we are all capable of it, that maybe we are the ones standing in our own way. 

So… I decided to try something.

I decided to write a letter to my future self, in 3 months. I have learned so much over the last couple years and I just wanted to see if I can pull all of it together and start to manifest some of the success that I’m aspiring for. If I want these things to happen, I have to get myself into the right mindset and really believe that I can do it.

At the end of 2019, I made it a goal to write a letter to my future self all through 2020. Every 3 months I’m going to open a letter to myself and write another one for another 3 months.

I think it will be really interesting to see all that happens and what I can accomplish in a year. A full year of experimenting with manifestation. 

The time is already going to pass, might as well start taking ACTION & try to start manifesting success!


December 23, 2019

While I’m writing this, it is December 23, 2019 & I wrote a letter to myself to be opened on March 23, 2020. 

By the time I read my letter at the end of March, I hope to be able to look back at this day and realize that the manifestation works. Believing in myself without putting pressure on myself works. That I can do and accomplish anything that I put my mind to. I’m not telling myself that I have to set completely unrealistic goals, but that I’m at least starting to see a shift!

Let’s see if this works!


March 23, 2020

This day has been in the back of my mind for the last 3 months. I’ve been wondering if I have been able to manifest the things that I wrote about in my letter.

Honestly, I didn’t manifest all that I wrote about in the letter. But, the letter brought me to tears. While reading it, I was feeling how I felt in that moment 3 months ago. I was thinking about everything that I was able to do & accomplish in those last 3 months.

This is an extremely powerful exercise.

Even though I didn’t reach some of those goals that I put in place for myself, I was able to reflect and understand just how far I was able to come in that time. I was able to see all of the work that I was able to accomplish. I was able to see everything that I was able to learn in those 3 months.

At one point I wrote, “No matter what you are feeling, don’t give up on yourself.” I also kept telling myself how proud I am of myself and to keep going no matter where I am in this moment.

I think this is important because we often don’t see & appreciate everything that we are doing and have done in our lives. Even though we don’t accomplish one specific goal, this exercise has helped me take a step back & really put everything into perspective.

It really got me thinking about where I was in that moment 3 months ago and everything that I’ve been able to do in that time. It’s about being able to put everything into perspective. Sometimes success doesn’t look the same as what we think and that’s why I think this exercise is so incredibly important. It’s about putting our trust into the universe and allowing life to unfold the way it’s supposed to.

We get so caught up in the motions of everyday life. We are so hard on ourselves, at least I am, when things don’t work out the way that we envisioned. It’s disappointing & discouraging because we think that we have failed. There is nothing like the feeling of failure and disappointment. Disappointment in ourselves for not being able to reach those goals we set out for ourselves.

I’m honestly shocked at how powerful this exercise is and I’m not just saying that to make this post more intriguing. We all have the power inside of ourselves to create the life that we desire. It takes a lot of mindset work, a lot of surrendering and putting trust in the universe that everything will work out the way it’s supposed to.

This exercise is so powerful because it allows you to reflect and see things in a different perspective. Just when you think you haven’t gotten very far in the last couple months, it helps you see everything that you truly were able to accomplish. Sometimes it looks different than what you originally had thought, and that can be very deceiving in the moment.


I would recommend this exercise to anyone! To anyone who is wanting to reach a different level of success in their lives. It’s incredibly powerful & I am still in shock about how incredible this exercise has been.

My goal for this year was to write a letter to myself every 3 months. So, I went ahead and wrote another letter to myself for June 23, 2020. I can’t wait to see everything that I will accomplish in these next 3 months!

Are you ready to take on the challenge as well?!

xx

The Importance of Celebrating Accomplishments

Over the last couple years, since I graduated from college in 2015, I’ve constantly felt like I’ve failed- unaccomplished, not good enough, not smart enough. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t seem to get to where I was hoping to be.

I don’t know about you, but I often find myself focusing on the things that I’m NOT doing/ haven’t accomplished. It’s so easy to focus on the negatives and what we aren’t doing in our lives or haven’t been able to accomplish in our lives.

I realized the career path I envisioned myself in was not for me and I really struggled to figure out what I was supposed to be doing, I started struggling with my mental health, I got fired from a job I thought was my “big break” (you can read more about this in Getting Fired Was The Best Thing to Happen To Me). I was 25 years old, still living with my parents and found myself without a job & not knowing where I was supposed to go next. Due to these reasons, I’ve considered the last couple years to be “dysfunctional”. 

It’s really discouraging when you think that nothing you are doing is working. Everyone around you seems to be accomplishing all of these amazing things and you’re over here struggling to do anything.

Until I thought…

Have I really “failed” at accomplishing anything?

What if what I was considering as failures are actually steps to getting me closer to success?

What if I’ve been so focused on thinking about “failures”, that I have actually been ignoring all of my accomplishments?

The first week of the new year, I found myself journaling about my accomplishments in the last decade and it opened my eyes to everything that I was able to accomplish, while I had been focusing on all of the things I was “failing” at. I realized that while I was focusing on all of the things that I hadn’t done, I was neglecting to really celebrate all of the things that I was able to do.

This exercise was really powerful for me because it made me shift my mindset away from thinking about everything that had gone wrong, to being proud of myself for all of the things that I was able to do and accomplish in the last decade.

I also recently filled out my spending & income sheet for 2019. I totaled all of my spending per month & income per month for when the time comes to file taxes. While I was calculating my income for each month, I decided to total the amount that I made in all of 2019. I’m not going to say the amount, but let’s just say that most couple would cringe at how little I made. 

However, I’m choosing to celebrate the fact that I made the money without knowing what the heck I’m doing. I’m trying to figure it out on my own. I experienced extreme burnout and exhaustion (you can read more about this in Getting Over Extreme Burnout). I was confused and unsure if I was doing what I was meant to be doing with my life. 

I’m now a couple months into this new year with new knowledge and a new energy and understanding about what I’m doing in my business. I have the tools and the knowledge needed to take the next step. 

Your mindset is EVERYTHING. What you choose to do with information is EVERYTHING. 

So, let me ask you, do you ever take the time to really celebrate those small “wins” along your journey? Really take the time to celebrate yourself, your business/life, all the hard work you do & have done, the sacrifices, the blood, sweat & tears you shed to get you to where you are today?

We get so caught up in wanting to achieve the bigger goal, that we don’t take the time to really celebrate all of the things that happen along the journey that leads us to that end goal.

But, I think it’s important to really take the time to celebrate and be proud of ourselves for how hard we’ve worked and all that we’ve been able to accomplish. 

When we think that we aren’t making any progress, it’s discouraging. When we focus on what we are failing at, it’s easy to get down on ourselves and give up.

Here are some tips to consider when trying to adjust your mindset:

Celebrate all of the wins

I say it’s important to celebrate all of the “wins” that even seem to be so small. Things that some people think are comparable to a “participation trophy”. I say, celebrating those things. Even something that seems as simple as celebrating getting out of bed in the morning. It’s something that seems so simple, but for some people, depending on what an individual is going through, that can be a step forward.  

CELEBRATE IT ALLLLL!!

Pay attention to your inner dialogue

Celebrating wins and accomplishments is important in making sure that you are continuing to move forward. Our self-talk and inner dialogue is so important in how we feel and how we show up for ourselves. 

We tend to be bullies to ourselves and are incredibly hard on ourselves. It’s like not matter what we do, it’s never enough. What you tell yourself is incredibly important for making sure that you are continuing to move forward. If you are constantly telling yourself that you are a “failure” and haven’t been able to accomplish anything, then you really aren’t going to get very far. Be kind to yourself & really start paying attention to your inner dialogue!

Forget what everyone else thinks

I say, who cares what everyone thinks. Write down every single thing you are proud of yourself for and take the time to actually CELEBRATE. You can read more about my own journey in Getting through a quarter life crisis.

In my recent post on Breaking Free From Society & Creating A Life You Love, I talk about forgetting about societal generalizations to start creating a life you actually LOVE living. We live and create a life based on what society says we should be doing & I’m calling BS on that. We all have special talents & traits that makes us unique and I think we deserve to CELEBRATE that uniqueness.

Forget about if society says your accomplishments aren’t worth celebrating. Forget that. YOU deserve to be celebrated- every single little thing you’ve done.

I have the knowledge- YOU have the knowledge, WE just need to take ACTION!

So, make sure that you are celebrating all of those “wins” throughout your journey, whatever that looks like for YOU! Those seemingly smaller “wins” are going to add up and could be potentially life-changing if you allow them.

Take the time to really think about and celebrate everything that you have done in life so far, and start celebrating them as they come. You may be surprised at how much you’ve actually been able to accomplish!

I would LOVE to support you along your journey! ❤ YOU GOT THIS!


I talk more about celebrating wins in my 5-Day Better Mindset Course!

THIS COURSE TEACHES YOU:

> how to stay consistent & monitor your mental, emotional & physical well-being
> how to shift your mindset to focus on what you’ve been able to accomplish vs. “failures”
> how to shift your mindset to focus on everything going right vs. everything that goes wrong

See you there!

xx

5 Days To A Better Mindset

I am a big believer in the fact that your mindset dictates everything in your life. Your mindset impacts how you feel physically & show up in the world, and how you show up for yourself altogether.

I have struggled with my own mindset over the last couple years, feeling frustrated and unsure of how to get myself out of the funk that I was in. After testing out different strategies, hiring some coaches and doing TONS of inner work, I’ve been able to figure out how to master my mindset.

Now, I want to help you master YOURS.

I completed a 5-Day Better Mindset Challenge in my private Facebook group, sharing a video training & assignment on what I think is really important in order to master mindset.

Since the women in my group had such a great experience, I have taken the videos and turned them into a course!

This course teaches you:

> how to stay consistent & monitor your mental, emotional & physical well-being
> how to shift your mindset to focus on what you’ve been able to accomplish vs. “failures”
> how to shift your mindset to focus on everything going right vs. everything that goes wrong

What’s included in the course:

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is better-mindset-course.png

DAY 1:

My strategy for monitoring my mental, emotional & physical well-being

DAY 2:

Focusing on your accomplishments vs. your failures

DAY 3:

Shifting your mindset to everything you are grateful for

DAY 4:

Shifting your mindset away from complaining & pinpointing the triggers

DAY 5:

Start manifesting your future by focusing on actionable steps towards your goals


Like I already mentioned, the videos in these training are from a challenge I completed on Facebook live in my Facebook community. The information included in this training are what I believe to be essential tools to mastering your mindset to really start showing up in your life!

ARE YOU READY TO TRANSFORM YOUR MINDSET?!

Don’t miss out on my other free trainings inside of my free Facebook community!

>>Strong, confident & empowered women<<

In this group, you will find daily inspiration, encouragement, find yourself in a community of like-minded women who strive to accomplish the same things and an opportunity to work with yours truly directly. ❤

I hope to see you there!


You can also check out my other blog posts that I think you might be interested in:

The Importance of Self-Care

Tips For When You’re Not Feeling Motivated

A lot can happen in just ONE YEAR!

5 Steps For Getting Back On Track & Shifting Your Mindset

Getting Over Extreme Burnout

My 8 Step Process to Overcoming Depression

Conquer your mindset, you can conquer your life! ❤ You got this!

xx

Breaking Free From Society & Creating A Life You Love

As someone who studied psychology in college and has always been fascinated by human behavior, I understand the importance of “fitting in” and being accepted. It’s just a human necessity. 

This can mean social acceptance, which is important for psychological and mental health. But, what about not fitting into generalized education and expectations? 

We are taught in our education system the information that we must be able to master to move onto the next level. But, what if your strengths and potential aren’t highlighted in those generalized areas? Are you just doomed to failure?

This is exactly what happened to me and what I know a lot of people struggle with. You can read more about this experience in My journey from a struggling high school student to starting my own business.

My strengths and potential were not highlighted in generalized education and expectations. I struggled in high school. When I say struggled, I mean STRUGGLED. I failed about 90% of the tests I took. I quite literally passed high school with test corrections and test retakes.

I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. I did everything that I was told I needed to do to master and understand the material. I studied hard. I tried all the techniques. I went into school early to get help and stayed after school. I did all the things and still couldn’t get it figured out.

I remember wanting to be successful so bad. But, there were times when I just thought that I wasn’t smart enough and didn’t have what it took to reach a level of success that I had always envisioned for myself. At that time, I wanted to get my doctorate in psychology. It was always a goal in the back of my mind. But, how could I possibly expect to get my doctorate when I was BARELY passing high school?

There were so many times when I was so frustrated because I just wanted to be smart like everyone else. I didn’t want to feel “dumb” and incapable. 

What I didn’t realize at the time, is that I was completely capable of success, it just looks a little bit different than the majority of people. I have unique talents and expertise that makes me so special and just as capable of success. I just had to work a little harder and go through some extra hoops to figure it out.

Our system teaches us that everything is going to be accomplished in a straight, linear line. There’s no telling what will happen if/when it doesn’t work out that way. So, when your life doesn’t progress like we thought it would, we immediately think that something is wrong.

Something is wrong with me

You go to school, get a degree, get a job, work until retirement. You’ll make enough money to get by, but never enough to be truly satisfied. That’s just life, right? That’s just the way it is.

But, what if there’s something more? I believe there is. You can read more about my opinion on this in my post about Why I’m Proud of Millennials and Proud To Be One.

I envision a fantasy life that I believe is completely attainable. 

I want to create something for myself, a life that I truly love living. I want to wake up every single morning, excited for the day ahead of me. I want my work to energize me, maybe even feel like I’m not really doing “work”. But, I want to make a difference and an impact.

You can sit at a desk for 9 hours a day, working “hard”, but not feeling fulfilled and like you’re truly making a difference in the world.

I believe in a world that isn’t micromanaged. 

A world that allows you to be who you are and make the impact that you are meant to make. Whatever that looks like for each person. Whether that means with a degree or no degree. We were all put on this earth for a reason and I believe that it is possible to live out that dream.

We’re taught that dreams are meant to be just that… Dreams. You must go to work and work until you are told that you can be done. If you’re already done with your work, scroll on your phone and pretend to be working until it’s time to go. 

If you hate what you do and dread Mondays, why not go on a journey to finding something that truly energizes you? 

For me, I’ve always wanted to make a difference in people’s lives. I knew that was my calling from a young age. It fires me up and makes me feel amazing. But, my career path has not been able to fulfill this for me. Even the business I’ve created at times. Sometimes, you have to be able to understand when and where it’s time to make a change. 

At the end of the day, you are in control of your life. Only you are fully in control of your life. 

It’s h a r d and frustrating to figure out what in the world you are supposed to be doing on earth. You feel like there’s only so many times you can fail and get back up without getting completely discouraged. Fearing that you just might make a complete fool of yourself. 

We’ve all been there and we don’t like it. But, at some point, it’s time to put pen to paper and really dig into who you are as a person. What you are meant to be doing on this earth. Sometimes, your journey doesn’t look like what others look like and that is completely fine!

So… how do you create a life that you truly love? Here are some things to think about.

What are some of your unique talents?

Like, really unique. We all have unique talents that makes us who we are and makes us so special. We all have something special & incredible to offer the world. 

There was one part of You Are A Badass: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life by Jen Sincero that really sticks out to me and I think is incredibly important.

She’s talking about going after your dreams, because someone out there needs what you have to offer. Sometimes our dreams seem so out of reach that we don’t really think about even trying to take action on them. I talk about this more in-depth in my post on A lot can happen in just ONE YEAR!.

What is something really energizes you?

This question seems really simple & easy, but it can be a tricky question. I know that it was for me when I was trying to figure out what it is that I really wanted to do. I just remembered how happy I felt when I was helping others work through any problems going on in their lives. 

I went through a whole process and you can read more about it in BUSINESS PLAN FOR 2020 / CHANGES TO BUSINESS. If you are having a hard time coming up with ideas, you can always reach out to friends/family & get an idea of what you are really good at!

What are you really passionate about?

This can be anything! Think hard about this because I think it’s really important to be able to incorporate the things that you are truly passionate about in your everyday life. This doesn’t necessarily have to be in terms of your career, but just any hobby or anything that you really love!

What does your dream life look like?

We all have a dream life that we think about, but don’t always think it’s attainable so we don’t even think about trying to act upon them. Think reallll hard about what this life looks like for you!

How attainable is your dream life?

Like I already mentioned, we often think that our “dream life” isn’t really attainable, so we don’t even try to take any action to reach that dream life status. I used to think the exact same way until I started realizing that I am completely in control of the trajectory of my life.

I bet that your dream life isn’t as out of reach as you would think. It’s up to you if you are willing to put in the work, including the mindset work to reach those goals. 

What actionable steps can you take to start living your ideal life?

What can you start doing TODAY to start making those dreams a reality? Are you going to start buying books and educate yourself more? Are you going to make it a goal to start putting yourself out in the world, jump out of your comfort zone so you can start growing & learning? Hire somebody to help you figure out how you can make those dreams a reality?

Trust me, there are probably simple steps that you can be taking TODAY to start living your dream life & start creating a life you love. 

What would you be doing if the generalization of society wasn’t holding you back?

Yes, throw away whatever society says you should be doing! Screw that. This is your life and you are in complete control of the outcomes of your life. 

Take away everything society says you should be doing and really think about what you would be doing with your life if society didn’t tell you what your life should look like!

Forget about society. Forget about generalization. This is all about YOU and what YOU want to get out of life! ❤


At the end of the day, I think that it is really important to really think about what it is that we really love to do and are passionate about. I think that the pressure that comes with the generalization of society can hold us back and make us feel like we can’t live a life that we truly love and makes us happy.

Life doesn’t always progress the way we are taught and doesn’t always look the same as everyone around us. The important thing to remember is to be true to yourself and not let the potential judgements & criticisms hold you back from living your life to the fullest. I believe it is possible, many people have done it before and many people are going to continue doing it.

The time is now to REALLY live your life! ❤

xx

My 8 Step Process to Overcoming Depression

*Before I start, I want to emphasize the fact the depression is very serious. While I have a degree in psychology, I am NOT a trained professional. If you feel like you need professional help, please seek professional help immediately! These tips are what helped me when I was experiencing depression. Just know that you are not alone, we are in this together! ❤ 

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255  


Depression is an unexplainable thing. It’s extremely serious and a lot of people experience depression to a certain extent at some time in their lives. It can come at any time and affect people in different ways. While depression can be a very isolating feeling, I want everyone to know that you are very much not alone. It can be very difficult to understand that while you are going through feeling of depression, but I want anyone reading this to know that you don’t have to go through this alone. 

Depression hit me hard and I was confused why I was feeling the way I was feeling because I truly have an amazing life. I was raised by the most amazing parents who gave me everything that I could have ever needed in my life growing up. I was always loved and truly had everything I needed to be happy. I have always been a naturally happy, cheerful, positive person. I have always loved that about myself and always wanted to spread as much happiness as possible. Which is why I wanted to pursue a career in psychology.

So, when I was feeling like I was slipping into depression, I honestly felt guilty and confused. 

On paper, I had everything that I could have ever needed in my life. I had every reason to be happy. I knew there were so many people in the world dealing with much harder situations, so I truly felt guilty. I felt like I didn’t need to feel the way that I did. What I didn’t understand at the time is that anyone can experience depression. It doesn’t matter how blessed you feel like you are. 

Depression isn’t just a “bad day” where you just “get over it” and move on. It’s not an emotion. Depression is serious and needs to be taken seriously. Most of the time, it takes some kind of therapy to dive deep into cognitive processes and treat the source as deemed necessary by a professional. 

It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you or you did anything wrong. However, I completely understand and resonate with people who tell themselves this on a daily basis. I know how serious depression is and how damaging it can be. While I experienced mild depression, I didn’t need to be put on an antidepressant, however some people do need to be.

There were some things that helped me & I want to take the time to write out the process I used to climb out of the depression. I hope that anyone reading this finds some hope that they will be able to make it through this and be able to experience at least some relief. ❤


1.I WENT TO THERAPY.

The absolute number one thing I want to mention first is I sought out professional help. I tried to do it on my own, but I eventually realized that it just wasn’t possible. So, I found a counselor in my network and I started going to therapy. To be honest, I never thought I would be someone who went to therapy. I always saw myself as someone being the therapist. I thought that if I went to therapy, that would mean that I didn’t have what it took to be a therapist, because I should be able to help myself if I’m going to help others. If that’s you at all, just know that’s absolutely not true! 

I truly give credit to therapy for really jump starting my healing process. If I didn’t have the therapy, I don’t think I would have been able to get through it, to be honest. It is so incredibly helpful to have a safe space to talk about everything going on, to cry if you need to and to have someone there to help you through it all. Every time I went, I would leave feeling 10 pounds lighter than I did when I walked in. Trust me when I say that the first step is to seek professional help. Trying to get through it on your own is almost impossible. It’s OK to allow yourself to get help if you need it! 

2. I STARTED TAKING SELF-CARE SERIOUSLY.

In addition to counseling, there’s definitely some inner work that needs to happen between sessions. One 1-hr session biweekly isn’t going to deliver results, because there’s work that you need to do on your own to. I remember things like struggling to sleep at night became nightly occurrence. I was sleeping an average of 3-4 hours per night and I was always exhausted.

In my first session with my therapist, she gave me several things to do to start taking care of myself better. Some things she told me to work on were: journaling, meditation, getting outside, exercising. The more I started started really focusing on myself and my self-care, the more I started noticing things falling into place. It was a hard journey, but definitely worth it in the end. Make sure you are really prioritizing your self-care! If you want some self-care ideas, make sure you check out my post on The Importance of Self-Care. ❤

3. I STARTED JOURNALING REGULARLY.

Journaled, and journaled some more! I know I’ve talked about this a lot, but I give a lot of credit to journaling for my progress. There’s just so many benefits that can come from journaling if you do it regularly. It can be a little weird to get started because you might not know what to talk about, but I promise if you keep at it, it will become a habit and you will start uncovering a lot going on in your subconscious! I wrote a blog post all about the transformative experience I’ve had with journaling and you can read all about it in The Power of Journaling.

4. I DOWNLOADED THE SANVELLO APP (PREVIOUSLY PACIFICA).

I’m actually surprised that I’ve never heard anyone other than my therapist talk about this app. I used this app religiously for 1-2 years while I was healing. I love it because there are guided meditations, journal prompts, you can rate how your day is going and so many other things. There is a free version, but you do have to pay to upgrade to use all of its features. I would pay for a month or 2 at a time while I felt like I needed extra help. You can easily downgrade the update the settings in the iTunes app.

I would highly recommend this app if you feel like you need some extra help! 

5. MADE IT A GOAL TO GET OUTSIDE everyday.

When I was feeling depressed, I noticed that all I wanted to do was lay in my dark room and watch TV. That’s literally ALL that I wanted to do. When I got home from work, I would change into the comfiest clothes I owned, turned off the lights and climbed into bed. That’s where I stayed until I had to get up the next morning for work. It could have been the most beautiful day outside & all I wanted to do was lay in bed in my dark room. So, I started making it a goal to get outside for at least 30 minutes a day. At least just sit outside on the patio, or even better, go for a walk. I just knew that I needed to get outside and get some fresh air. 

What started as just sitting outside for a half hour, turned into actually getting some exercise. I started going on walks every morning when I got up. I would go for walks during the sunrise, take deep breaths and really take in the beauty of nature. I also started walking around during my lunch breaks at work. Just to get outside, walk around and debrief. Nature is truly powerful!

6. I STARTED EXERCISING AGAIN.

I have always been into exercising. I grew up an athlete and always enjoyed being in the gym. In a Behavioral Psychology class I took in college, I remember the professor asking us to write down one thing that would be a sign something was wrong if we stopped doing it. Something we are truly passionate about. For me, it was working out. So, when I found that I hadn’t gone to the gym in 2-3 months, I knew that I needed to slowly get back into it. Even if it just meant going on a walk in the evening. Just starting slow. Starting somewhere. 

So, I started making it a goal to get to the gym a couple times a week after work. I slowly started making working out a priority again and started noticing myself feeling better about myself. You can read more about this in My Fitness Journey | Choosing Yourself First.

7. I started eating healthier.

Here’s the thing, I actually lost about 10 pounds while going through this. But, losing weight DOES NOT ALWAYS EQUAL HAPPINESS. Especially in this example because I was not making healthy choices. I wasn’t eating a lot and when I was, I was eating things like cliff bars for dinner. When I did eat, it wasn’t always the best food choices. Honestly, when you start fueling your body with nutritious foods, you start feeling so much better overall. Like everything, this takes a lot of time and patience.

I actually hired an online health coach that made a plan for me because I knew that I needed some help. While I completely understand that this isn’t always financially reasonable for some people, there are so many resources online to refer to in making some changes to diet. There are so many ways to make small changes throughout the day to keep damaging chemicals out of the body. 

There’s just so much benefit to fueling your body with healthy, nutritious foods. Other than the known benefits to you physically, it can help with your mental health as well. Just simply changing my diet helped me start to feel better!

8. I started hanging out with friends.

I remember during this time, I wasn’t really motivated to go out and hang out with friends. I found myself wanting to just stay home and watch TV all day. While it was lonely, that’s what I preferred.

But, I noticed that when I did spend time outside of the house and interacting with my friends, that I actually started feeling better. So, I made it a goal to start making plans with my friends.

Even though you might feel exhausted and just want to lay around all day by yourself, just getting yourself out can make you start feeling better!


RECAP

At the end of the day, it’s taken about 2-3 years of working on myself to get to where I am today. There is no magic solution to feeling better and loving yourself again, or maybe for the first time. You’re not going to wake up one day feeling amazing. There’s not going to be a magic feeling that you are ready to conquer the world. 

However, starting with small goals will turn into HUGE accomplishments. The process will look different for everyone. But, I know there are a couple universal things that will help most people. Those things being:

  • Getting professional help
  • Journaling
  • Getting outside
  • Exercising
  • Fueling the body with healthy, unprocessed food
  • Getting yourself out of the house and spending time with friends

One other thing I recommend doing is tracking progress. For me, this is done by writing in my journal. I keep all of my journals and sometimes refer back to them. I find myself looking back at the same day a year or two prior, just to see all of the progress I’ve made over the years. Just when you feel like you haven’t made any progress, you will realize how far you have truly come.

You got this! Don’t be afraid to reach out for help if you need it! ❤

xx