When one door closes, another one opens.
Getting Fired Was the Best Thing to Happen to Me
To clarify, I mean in my professional career, being able to do exactly what I want & fulfill my happiness.
When I first realized that clinical work was not for me, it started me off on a 3 year stress-filled journey to figure out where I was supposed to be. I became so overwhelmed & completely engulfed in trying to get this figured out.
When I finally got a job offer in May 2018, I thought it was the “big break” I was looking for. I tried to convince myself that I really enjoyed it and a good fit for me. I felt like this had to be it because I’ve worked so hard and stressed out so much about it that this had to work out.
I was completely overwhelmed, the job was not a good fit at all. I overworked myself trying to make myself good at the job. But, I wasn’t. I was so engulfed in trying to get my professional career off, I was completely risking my mental health. But, I was OK with it because I knew that you have to start somewhere, especially at the bottom. I knew that I had to work through the discomfort before getting to where I wanted to be. So, I kept going and kept trying. Even when I wasn’t at work, I spent every waking minute trying to figure out how I could be better at the job.
I got so overwhelmed & had completely abandoned all of my daily self-care habits. I got to a point where I felt like I was feeling depressed again. I didn’t have health insurance because I was waiting for my new insurance to kick in. So, I was trying to figure out how I was going to pay out of pocket to see my doctor and get on meds. (Feel free to check out my posts on The Importance of Self-Care and My 8 Step Process to Overcoming Depression).
Then, I got fired.
At the end of my 5th week on the job, I was brought into the office at 6:45am and they fired me. I had to pack up my desk into my purse, while the other employees around me just watched me while I was in complete embarrassment. I rushed out the door with my tail between my legs, and haven’t been the same since.
In that moment, I was feeling numb, pretty confused about what just happened. I went home and for the first time in YEARS, I allowed my mind to STOP. I was forced into a period of self-reflection. What’s next? I had such a hard time getting an interview for a job and now I have to explain why I had 3 jobs in 6 months, one being for only 5 weeks. I have to be honest, I was tired of revising my resume and trying to explain my professional journey thus far. I get that it’s what you “have” to do, but man it’s exhausting.
So, I decided not to look for another job. I decided that it wasn’t worth trying to explain myself, my knowledge, my expertise, my belonging to Corporate America. I was ambitious and ready to get the show on the road, but I was so emotionally exhausted. I didn’t know which way to go, or what the next step was going to be. The unknown of the future was so blurred, even more than before.
My dad offered to give me a position at the business he and his friend started up. They needed help with marketing and social media. They weren’t able to pay me much, but it was something to give me some kind of experience and knowing that my efforts were at least appreciated.
It ended up being the biggest blessing.
I loved the flexibility. Not being constantly stressed all the time, actually doing things I actually enjoyed doing. I was able to make the position my own, exercise my abilities and showcase all of my knowledge and talents without being micromanaged.
That’s when I was 100% certain that I was not meant to be a part of Corporate America. That’s also when I realized WHY I was never given a chance. I’m not meant to be there.
That’s OK. I’m realizing that now. Starting my own business is really freaking hard. I’m doing this all on my own, trying to figure everything out & make a living for myself. But, I am able to utilize my knowledge, expertise, education and my work experience thus far. Honestly, my resume doesn’t make much sense. I have 3 years of clinical work, 3 months in childcare, 5 weeks in recruiting and a Master’s Degree in Business Psychology. I can imagine recruiters looking at my resume and thinking: “This girl seems confused.”
Thank U, Next.
So, here I am. Trying to put together the pieces of my business at my parent’s house all day with my cat. Even though it’s hard as heck, I wouldn’t change a single thing.
Read more about my journey in these posts:
This means even better opportunities are on the horizon.
Yes they are girl, you better believe it. Whatever you do, DO NOT give up.