Have you been contemplating hiring a life coach – or any kind of coach? It’s an investment that can be hard to make because it’s often pushed off to the side as “not important”. But, sometimes, it can be the exact thing you need to get to where you want to be.
I am passionate about this because I was in the same position just a couple of years ago. I was in a place in my life where I felt very lost & confused about where I was at in life, my purpose & the next direction to go. It was very frustrating & confusing.
I remember laying in bed at night googling & searching the depths of Pinterest for “Ways To Get My Life Back On Track” or “How To Be Happier” or “How To Figure Out My Life Purpose”. I was so ready to get my life figured out & on track.
I was tired of being tired.
Tired of where I was in life. Constantly feeling stuck & stagnant, feeling like I was running in circles, going nowhere fast.
I remember being desperate for answers & I just wanted SOMEONE to tell me what to do. Someone to guide me & tell me how to get out of the cycle that I had gotten myself into.
It wasn’t until I decided to make the scary decision to make a big investment in myself that things in my life started falling into place.
The guidance & accountability helped me go from a frustrated, exhausted & unemployed 25 year old still living at my parents house to a happy, successful & independent entrepreneur helping others have the same transformation in their own lives!
The decision to make the investment in myself was a hard & scary decision. There were so many “what ifs?” & push backs. Nobody wants to spend the money, especially that kind of money on themselves.
But, I decided to do it.
I had a choice to make: either keep going the way things were- continue running in circles, being frustrated & getting nowhere OR take the guidance from someone who knew exactly what I needed to do.
It worked. The investment in myself completely changed the trajectory of my life. Looking back, I have no idea what my life would look like now if I never made the investment. It honestly paid for itself.
Now, I’m sure you’re asking yourself, “But I don’t know if this is for me! I don’t know if it’s worth it & worth the money”.
Trust me, I completely understand. It’s a hard decision. For that reason, I wanted to break down some of the key signs that it’s time for you to hire a coach & that it IS worth the investment. I’m laying out the signs AND how a coach can help you.
I don’t want you going another day feeling lost & confused because you don’t have to do this alone. There are answers. Read this post & see if hiring a coach is the answer that you’ve been searching for!<3
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YOU ARE FEELING STAGNANT/STUCK IN LIFE
A major sign that it’s time to hire a coach is that you are feeling stagnant. It’s like you feel like you are just running in circles, seemingly getting nowhere. No matter what you try to do, it feels like you keep ending up right back where you started. It can feel like you are just going through the motions of life, not depressed- but unhappy & confused with where you are. No matter what you try to do, it’s not working. You keep hitting dead ends & it’s frustrating. You might even be seeing others on social media achieving things, making big moves in their lives & you feel like you’re just not getting anywhere.
Feeling “stagnant” is the exact word that I would use to describe how I felt in life right before I decided to hire a coach. I felt like I was just going through the motions of life because it’s what I “needed to do”. But, I wasn’t feeling fulfilled & I wasn’t progressing where I really wanted to be. I was stuck.
How a coach can help
Here’s the thing- it’s frustrating in itself to try to figure this out on your own. It’s hard to find the answers when you don’t even know where to look. Often, you can get stuck in your own head & it can be VERY confusing.
A coach will help you work through where you’re at, where you want to be & help you come up with a plan of action to get there. Even if you aren’t sure where you want to be, a coach can help you figure that out! It’s a process, but a coach can make things more clear for you by giving you the exact tools, resources & strategies that you need.
Sometimes, it takes slowing down & digging deep within to really figure things out. Rather than running in circles trying to figure it out on your own, having a coach can help guide you to figure out where to go next & how to get there.
YOU ARE FEELING UNALIGNED WITH YOUR PURPOSE
Here’s the thing, I truly believe that every single person was put on this earth for a reason. We all have unique talents & desires that bring us joy. When engaged in these things, you should be feeling a sense of fulfillment & happiness.
When you are feeling unaligned with your purpose in life, it can feel like you are just going through the motions, not feeling fulfilled or that you are taking steps that will help you move forward. Essentially, you are feeling like the path you are currently on isn’t doing anything to help you get to what you are truly put on this earth to do.
Not feeling aligned with your purpose can be a very confusing feeling because you are at a point where you know you aren’t doing what you are meant to do, but you might not know where to go next.
Not feeling aligned can influence your overall confidence in yourself & you start noticing your overall motivation start to decrease. It ultimately starts to influence every part of your life- including your everyday habits & taking care of yourself because you start operating from a mindset of “What’s the point?”.
How a coach can help
It’s important to understand that not feeling aligned with what you are doing is a very normal experience that a lot of people go through. Some people figure it out faster than others & don’t need much guidance. But, if you are like me, the process seems to take a lot longer to figure out. Plus, it might be helpful to have someone to guide you because you’ve exhausted all of your ideas on your own.
A coach can help you dig deep within yourself to figure out why you aren’t feeling aligned with your purpose, what it is that you really want to do with your life & the steps you need to take to get there. Sometimes, you can get to a point where you feel completely overwhelmed with trying to get everything figured out & you just need someone to guide you.
YOU ARE FEELING FRUSTRATED & DISCOURAGED
No matter what your life looks like right now, you might be at a point where you are just feeling frustrated with trying to figure things out & might even be feeling discouraged. You might be thinking, “Will I ever get this figured out?” or “Will I ever get on my feet & create a sustainable life that I actually enjoy?”.
You’re T I R E D of seeing others achieving all of these accomplishments in their careers, buying houses, getting married, having kids, going on nice vacations, etc etc & you are struggling to put one foot in front of the other. When you are feeling frustrated & discouraged, you tend to fall even deeper into comparison. Comparing yourself & your life to others & it just makes you feel even worse because you can’t figure out how to get there too.
Now, you are exhausted, frustrated & just want to get things figured out already.
Trust me, I COMPLETELY understand this frustration because I was definitely at that point as well. I remember spending a lot of time searching the depths of Google & Pinterest, trying to piece together a plan for myself. I always ended up in a dead end & habits I was trying to create never stuck. After trying to figure everything out on my own, comparing myself to others, I started getting frustrated & discouraged. I started thinking that maybe I would never be able to figure it out because I was so burnt out & tired of putting in the effort of trying to figure it out.
How a coach can help
OK- at this point of feeling frustrated & discouraged, you’ve developed a “lacking” mindset because you can only see the things that you don’t have yet. When you get into this mindset, it can be really hard to get out of it because you are just feeling D O N E. You’ve probably found yourself in a cycle & you can’t figure out how to get out of it. Subconsciously, you’ve given up & no matter what you try, you’re convinced that it’s not going to work.
You need OUT of that cycle & that mindset! When you are at the level of frustration & feeling discouraged with trying, you need an outside resource to guide you. Trust me on this because I’ve been in your shoes before! You need someone to guide you out of that mindset & get you back on track towards reaching those goals. It’s time to stop trying to figure it out on your own because it’s not working!
YOU ARE STRUGGLING TO REACH YOUR GOALS
Ahhh, goals. If you’ve read any of my other posts, you probably know that I have a love/hate relationship with goals. Goals for me bring pressure. Pressure on myself to achieve something. I used to perseverate on trying to reach a particular goal I set for myself, get burnt out & beat myself up when I failed to reach the goal.
Related: How to finally start achieving your goals, Ultimate Goal Setting & Planning
If you can relate to that in any capacity, I completely understand how you are feeling right now. “Why can’t I reach these goals?!”
Maybe you’ve given up on setting goals for yourself altogether or still continuing to beat yourself up when you don’t reach a goal. It’s time to change your perception around goals & your approach. It’s time to create a PLAN that actually works for YOU!
So, if you are finding yourself struggling to reach your goals, it might be time to look at your goals differently. To sit down & gain clarity around what it is that you really want & come up with a plan for getting there.
How a coach can help
As someone who had to repair my relationship with my own goals, I can tell you that there IS an answer that you are looking for in terms of achieving your goals. Believe it or not, there isn’t a “one size fits all” approach to goals. Different people require different strategies that work for them in terms of reaching goals.
- Some people are motivated by big goals & need to have a big goal to work towards at all times.
- Others (like me) get stressed out when it comes to goals. So, there needs to be a different strategy & approach.
That’s where a coach comes in! A coach will help you gain clarity around your vision for your life, look at your long term & short term goals & help you develop a plan. Sometimes, it takes breaking down the goal, looking at it from a different perspective & approaching it differently.
Why continue being frustrated with yourself, when you can have a coach help you gain clarity, develop a plan & start taking action TODAY?!
YOUR MOTIVATED & READY FOR A CHANGE, BUT DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Another MAJOR sign that you are ready to hire a coach is feeling like you are at a point where you are READY for a change, but don’t know what steps you need to take to get there. You might not even know what direction you need to go, you just know that you are ready for something different.
This could be in terms of your business, career or lifestyle in general, you just feel like something is missing. You’ve probably tried to figure it out on your own, but you’ve gotten to a point where you are just ready for some guidance. Your motivation & desire are there, you just need some guidance to help you start taking action & moving in the right direction.
How a coach can help
When you are trying to figure it out on your own, you tend to consume way too much information & it can make it SO HARD to develop a plan that actually works for YOU. It can be overwhelming & you can start feeling like you aren’t getting very far, no matter how hard you try. At this point, you are all over the place & in need of some guidance.
That’s where having a coach comes into play! A coach will help you work through your vision for life and help you start gaining clarity on the direction to go. Since everyone is different, that means that we all tend to need different things & processes to get there. In trying to piece together a plan from what others have done, it can really confuse you & lead you to just running in circles. You need to clear your mind of all the random pieces of information you’ve consumed & gain clarity on the direction that works for YOU.
Trust me, having someone to guide you through the process will help you get to where you want to be MUCH faster than if you continue to try to figure it out on your own!
YOU DON’T ACTUALLY BELIEVE YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO GET TO WHERE YOU WANT TO BE
You have big goals & aspirations for yourself, but deep down you really don’t believe you have what it takes to get there. You might not know it yet, but you’ve already accepted failure before you even try to work towards those goals & aspirations. This has to do with confidence & limiting beliefs about yourself & your abilities.
Confidence is a major aspect that holds a lot of people back from taking action on their lives. You desire something in your life, but you haven’t tried to start taking action because you have already- maybe subconsciously- accepted failure before you even get started. It is probably the main reason why you haven’t even tried taking the necessary steps to getting there.
So, at this point, you are feeling like you really want to start making those next steps to working towards those goals, but you keep talking yourself out of it. You’re worried that you are going to “fail” and that feels embarrassing for you.
How a coach can help
Limiting beliefs, fears, excuses, etc., tend to pop up during times when we are about to take scary action. It’s our ego trying to *protect* us from the potential pain that *could* happen. These thoughts can be so intense & seem real, that we start believing them.
The thing about these thoughts, is there ARE ways to work around them! It’s also important to understand that EVERYONE experiences these thoughts. Even those who seem to have all the confidence & success in the world- they also have those thoughts pop up from time to time. The thing is- they don’t let them completely take over. They allow themselves to work through the thought process & often have someone to help them along the way.
That’s why having a coach can be so important. On calls, a coach will listen to those thoughts that you are having, how you are talking about yourself, help you work through those beliefs & figure out why you are having those thoughts. Based on where you are at, you will then be provided with the tools, exercises & resources to help you work through those thoughts & beliefs.
If you continue trying to move forward without a coach, you will probably continue to (unintentionally) stand in your own way & let the negative thoughts take over. Don’t beat yourself up! Know that it’s OK to ask for help if you need it. <3
YOU ARE CONSTANTLY SELF SABOTAGING
The last area that I want to focus on is constant self sabotaging. This means that no matter what you are doing, you are constantly beating yourself up for whatever reason it may be. It can be in terms of your motivation, not being where you thought you should be, making poor choices/decisions, etc.
When you get into self sabotaging, you tend to get into a cycle & it becomes a mindset. You are already accepting that you are going to do something wrong & the first thing that you think about when you wake up in the morning is about something you think you are doing wrong- or did do wrong. You start beating yourself up for every little, minor thing & in your eyes, you start thinking that you can’t do anything right.
You are in a battle with yourself & this could be for many different reasons. It could be because you are actually very tired of the hustle & feeling discouraged or that you need to heal your relationship with yourself. Or maybe, both!
How a coach can help
You need a plan with structure & accountability. A coach will help guide you through the process of changing your inner dialogue with yourself, providing you with various exercises to start doing everyday & provide you with the accountability you need to make sure that you are doing the work that you need to do.
It’s a process, but there ARE answers. Sometimes, whether we want to believe it or not, we need some guidance. We NEED someone to tell us exactly what we need to do in order to be able to snap out of the cycle we’ve gotten into.
It’s time to stop beating yourself up, my love. There are answers & you do not have to go through this alone!
I spent a lot of time writing this post. It’s taken several months of revisions because I wanted to make sure that it was exactly right. I was inspired to write this post because of the conversations I kept having with my clients. Some of the conversations we were having, I know that a lot of people need them as well.
Making an investment in something like this can be hard. It can be pushed off to the side & perceived as not important. But, if you can relate to anything that I mapped out in this post, make sure that you aren’t holding yourself back & making excuses to not invest in something that would be truly beneficial for you.
It’s been an empowering journey for myself to go through the experience of having a coach by my side to provide me the guidance I need. I’ve learned so much about myself that I can’t imagine what my life would be like if I never decided to make the investment. My life has seriously changed forever & I am so honored & grateful to be able to provide the same kind of experience for other women!
I truly hope you found this post to be valuable & helpful in providing some kind of clarity into whether you would find coaching to be beneficial for you. I truly am here for you if you need anything! If you are interested in learning more about my 1:1 coaching, invite you to check out my opportunities! Click here for more information on my 1:1 coaching opportunities! <3
Also, Make sure you check out my other resources!
>> click here to download my Ultimate Goal Setting & Planning guide
>> click here to learn more about my secret life changing check in system
>> click here to download my Step-by-Step Guide to Handling Stress & Overwhelm
>> click here to download my Self Care Planning Worksheet
>> click here to download my 50 journal prompts for self reflection & self discovery
Coach Jessie Shibko