Gaining confidence to be your true, authentic self

Ah confidence, something that I know all of us wish we had more of to some extent. I used to be painfully shy, easily embarrassed & incredibly worried about what other people thought of me. I used to just hide in my own little shell, because that is where I felt I was safe. Safe from any potential judgement from anyone. No fear of making a fool out of myself. There have definitely been times when I wished I was more confident in myself. 

I wished that I wasn’t so painfully shy & introverted because it would make things a whole lot easier. 

I wished that I was someone who was just naturally outgoing & seemed to be full of confidence. 

I wished I was able to put myself out there and achieve what naturally extroverted people were doing. They made it seem so effortless & I wanted that.

Over the last couple of years, on this journey towards my late 20s, I’ve learned how to love myself for who I am. I’ve learned to be confident in who I am and to live my life authentically. I’ve finally been able to accept myself for who I am and to not wish I was someone else anymore.

If you are looking for ways to build your confidence, accept yourself for who you really are and to start living your life authentically, this post is for you. I am laying out my tips & strategies that you can use to start getting the most out of YOUR life.  

ACCEPT WHO YOU ARE 

Before anything else, you have to accept yourself and everything that makes you, YOU. The things that we think are our “flaws” or that we wish was different about us are the things that make us who we are. They make us unique. 

For me, I had to accept that I was shy & an introvert. It’s just who I am and it’s not worth trying to change myself or wish that I was different. Same for you. You have to accept everything about who you are and love yourself for those things. 

GET OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

The comfort zone is great because it’s comfortable, but it’s not going to help you get to where you really want to be. You have to challenge yourself and put yourself out there in ways that are going to make you feel like you are going to jump out of your own skin.

When you first start doing things that are out of your comfort zone, you are going to feel like you are going to explode. But, the more that you do it and challenge yourself, you are going to start noticing that you are starting to gain confidence in yourself. You are going to start seeing that you do have what it takes, which ultimately helps in increasing your overall confidence in yourself. 

DON’T WORRY ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK

Along this journey, there are several things that are going to pop into your head. Things like:

What if I make a fool out of myself? 

What if I fail miserably? 

What if nobody cares what I have to say?

Why would anyone care what I have to say? 

What if I completely embarrass myself & make a fool out of myself?

These are things that would constantly be circling in my head. I was so worried about what other people would like of me. I was worried about making a fool of myself. I was afraid of failing in front of everyone. What I realized, eventually, is that I was letting the potential negative opinions of others control my own thoughts about myself. I finally got to a point where I had to come to the realization that this fear of potential failure & falling flat on my face in complete embarrassment was really the only thing holding me back.

It’s definitely easier said than done. Trust me, I completely understand because I’ve been through it before. But, you have to let go of the fear of what people will think of you. When you do that, you are giving other people the power over your life. 

CONSTANT PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT WORK

Personal development is a never-ending, on-going journey that should always be a part of your lifestyle. When I started prioritizing myself and my self care, things really started falling into place for me & have helped me remain consistent. I started understanding myself on a different level & have continued believing in myself and my abilities. 

Fear & limiting beliefs will always try to creep into your thoughts and stop you from doing things that you really want to do. Having a system in place where you can work through these thoughts is going to help you with not letting them take over. 

>> click here to download my self care planning worksheet

>> click here to download my 50 journal prompts for self reflection & self discovery


The most important thing that I’ve learned over the years is how much of my life is in my control. It is so easy to look at the big picture and to think that it is completely impossible, but we have to realize what is in our control. Once you start understanding yourself, accepting yourself, taking care of yourself, anything is possible for you. You do have what it takes to be confident in yourself & live your life authentically.

I encourage you to start doing little things to get yourself out there. To get you out of your comfort zone. To start living the life you’ve always wanted. I’m not saying big things, just small little changes that you can start doing today to help makes this possible. You are the only person that is in control of your own life! 

We are all learning & growing every single day. Amazing things can happen, if we keeping working towards letting go of potential negative outcomes & start becoming our true, authentic selves. Now, let’s all get out there & start living our best lives! <3

Xx,
– Jess

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