Blissfully jess

Getting Fired Was The Best Thing to Happen to Me

When one door closes, another one opens.

Getting Fired Was the Best Thing to Happen to Me

To clarify, I mean in my professional career, being able to do exactly what I want & fulfill my happiness.

When I first realized that clinical work was not for me, it started me off on a 3 year stress-filled journey to figure out where I was supposed to be. I became so overwhelmed & completely engulfed in trying to get this figured out.

When I finally got a job offer in May 2018, I thought it was the “big break” I was looking for. I tried to convince myself that I really enjoyed it and a good fit for me. I felt like this had to be it because I’ve worked so hard and stressed out so much about it that this had to work out.

I was completely overwhelmed, the job was not a good fit at all. I overworked myself trying to make myself good at the job. But, I wasn’t. I was so engulfed in trying to get my professional career off, I was completely risking my mental health. But, I was OK with it because I knew that you have to start somewhere, especially at the bottom. I knew that I had to work through the discomfort before getting to where I wanted to be. So, I kept going and kept trying. Even when I wasn’t at work, I spent every waking minute trying to figure out how I could be better at the job.

I got so overwhelmed & had completely abandoned all of my daily self-care habits. I got to a point where I felt like I was feeling depressed again. I didn’t have health insurance because I was waiting for my new insurance to kick in. So, I was trying to figure out how I was going to pay out of pocket to see my doctor and get on meds.

Then, I got fired.

At the end of my 5^th week on the job, I was brought into the office at 6:45am and they fired me. I had to pack up my desk into my purse, while the other employees around me just watched me while I was in complete embarrassment. I rushed out the door with my tail between my legs, and haven’t been the same since.

Thank. Goodness.

In that moment, I was feeling numb, pretty confused about what just happened. I went home and for the first time in YEARS, I allowed my mind to STOP. I was forced into a period of self-reflection. What’s next? I had such a hard time getting an interview for a job and now I have to explain why I had 3 jobs in 6 months, one being for only 5 weeks. I have to be honest, I was tired of revising my resume and trying to explain my professional journey thus far. I get that it’s what you “have” to do, but man it’s exhausting.

So, I decided not to look for another job. I decided that it wasn’t worth trying to explain myself, my knowledge, my expertise, my belonging to Corporate America. I was ambitious and ready to get the show on the road, but I was so emotionally exhausted. I didn’t know which way to go, or what the next step was going to be. The unknown of the future was so blurred, even more than before.

My dad offered to give me a position at the business he and his friend started up. They needed help with marketing and social media. They weren’t able to pay me much, but it was something to give me some kind of experience and knowing that my efforts were at least appreciated.

It ended up being the biggest blessing.

I loved the flexibility. Not being constantly stressed all the time, actually doing things I actually enjoyed doing. I was able to make the position my own, exercise my abilities and showcase all of my knowledge and talents without being micromanaged.

That’s when I was 100% certain that I was not meant to be a part of Corporate America. That’s also when I realized WHY I was never given a chance. I’m not meant to be there.

That’s OK. I’m realizing that now. Starting my own business is really freaking hard. I’m doing this all on my own, trying to figure everything out & make a living for myself. But, I am able to utilize my knowledge, expertise, education and my work experience thus far. Honestly, my resume doesn’t make much sense. I have 3 years of clinical work, 3 months in childcare, 5 weeks in recruiting and a Master’s Degree in Business Psychology. I can imagine recruiters looking at my resume and thinking: “This girl seems confused.”

Thank U, Next.

So, here I am. Trying to put together the pieces of my business at my parent’s house all day with my cat. Even though it’s hard as heck, I wouldn’t change a single thing.

This means even better opportunities are on the horizon.

Yes they are girl, you better believe it. Whatever you do, DO NOT give up.

- Blissfully Jess2

Who do you workout for?

The new year is a time when people make resolutions, usually having to do with enhancing their lives in some way. As known, one of the most common New Year’s Resolution is to go to the gym and get in shape. But, what about a resolution to NOT go to the gym?

Going to the gym & getting in shape should be done to feel better about yourself, and enhance your overall well-being. Fitness can have so many positive mental & physical impacts, but a recent conversation with a friend completely baffled me & inspired me.

A couple weeks ago I was having a conversation said friend and they (I’m choosing to keep them completely anonymous) said something to me that really got me thinking. This is the gist of how the conversation went:

Friend: “My goal for 2019 is to not go to the gym at all this year”

Me: *confused* …“what?”

Friend: “Yeah, I started to realize that I was going to the gym to look good for others, not to make myself feel better.”

To be honest, I was in a state of shock. But after a while, I started thinking about how powerful and inspiring that is. “I started to realize that I was going to the gym to look good for others, not to make myself feel better.” First and foremost, I am so proud of my friend for acknowledging the fact they were doing something to impress someone else, not for themselves. Making a decision to do something that is completely opposite of the norm because you realized you are doing it for all the wrong reasons is so powerful. Seriously! Going to the gym should be about YOU! It never occurred to me to think about it this way.

After thinking about it for some time, it made me realize that I needed to take a step back and make sure I am doing things for myself, not for others. Actually, I think we all need to take a moment to stop and think about whether we are doing things for no other reason than for ourselves.

*To clarify: I am talking about “things” related to self-care. Like, working out, in this scenario.

Working out is such a great way to improve our overall physical & mental health, but we have to make sure we are doing it for all the right reasons.

Ask yourself these questions:

Are you working out to impress someone?

Are you working out to look good for someone else?

Are you working out to post a gym selfie on Instagram?

Are you working out to get in shape & feel good about yourself?

Especially with social media being so powerful, we are always cautious about what others are thinking of us. We want to post the most beautiful images of ourselves & are constantly worried about what others will think. But, at the end of the day, we do need to make sure that we are taking care of ourselves, taking a mental break from looking good for others and make sure we are truly taking care of our well-being.

For me, fitness has completely changed my life in so many ways. I feel so much more confident & happy and I can’t imagine letting go of my workout routine. The last time I did that, I fell into some serious mental health issues. But, for me, I decided to get back into the gym for myself. It’s something I use for self-care & something I identify with!

While I still believe that health & fitness is important, this recent conversation has left we thinking about it in a whole different perspective. It made me really think about making sure I am making these decisions for myself, rather than for the acceptance of others.

While social acceptance is a human necessity, I do think we all as a society could start thinking more about our mental health as well. In my personal experiences, when I start taking care of myself & my mental health, social acceptance follows.

So let me ask you this…

Are you really doing things, like working out, for yourself or for others?

- Blissfully Jess2

Gaining confidence to be my true, authentic self

Growth happens outside of the comfort zone.

I’ve always been painfully shy, easily embarrassed & incredibly worried about what other people thought of me. It’s a natural instinct because we all need social acceptance. I used to just hide in my own little shell, because that where I felt I was safe. Safe from any potential judgement from anyone. No fear of making a fool out of myself. But there have definitely been times when I wished I was less shy & introverted & more naturally outgoing. I wished I was able to put myself out there and achieve what they were doing. They made it seem so effortless.

What if I make a fool out of myself? What if I fail miserably? What if nobody cares what I have to say?

Finding yourself and figuring out your purpose can be a very difficult journey. Everyone’s journey is different, but that’s what makes it so special. Like a lot of people, my confidence was super low, especially in high school. I didn’t realize how low it was until I got to college. That’s when I started coming out of my shell and starting to get myself out there more and more. Over the last couple years, the most important thing I’ve learned is that wishing wasn’t going to help me achieve my goals. Less wishing more doing. I started actively doing things that purposely put me out of my comfort zone.

Since personal growth happens outside of the comfort zone.

Of course, it started working & I slowly started gaining more confidence & ultimately accept who I am. Which is great, I’ve learned a lot and grown A LOT. But, it wasn’t until this last year that I actually realized what was holding me back. While I was gaining confidence, I still had this feeling in the back of my head that I just didn’t have what it took to do exactly what I wanted to do to reach my goals. But, I was holding myself back because I was so worried about what others would think. Why would anyone care what I have to say? What if I completely embarrass myself & make a fool out of myself?

What I realized, eventually, is that I was letting the potential negative opinions of others control my own thoughts about myself. I finally got to a point where I had to come to the realization that this fear of potential failure & falling flat on my face in complete embarrassment was really the only thing holding me back. Yes, I’m super shy and anxious, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have the “personality”. I needed to realize that I needed to take the control back for myself. To realize that I’m the only one that is completely in control of my own life & the path that I decide to take for myself. I still wish I wasn’t so anxious all the time, but I am definitely proud of myself for taking the necessary steps to getting to this point. I still have a long way to go, but boy have I come a long way.

Ever since I launched my business and started writing blogs, I’ve had such an incredible response. I finally let go of the potential negative outcome and negative reactions that I just let myself do what I wanted, how I wanted. What I have learned is: people care. It has seriously taken a long, sometimes painful, road to get to this point of discovery. But, it’s true and it feels so good to finally have that weight lifted off my shoulders.

I no longer think to myself, “wow, I wish I was more like that” because I have realized that I am truly the only one holding myself back. I’ve heard a lot of success stories that come from people who work hard and take really risky chances. Staying in your comfort zone is only going to provide you with mediocre results, ultimately keeping you from living life to the absolute fullest. Life can be tricky & social media can make things a lot harder for people to find their confidence. We are more connected than ever & it is so easy to compare ourselves. “Wow, I wish I looked like her”, “Her life seems so perfect”.

There are still times when I have those “Oh crap, what have I done?” moments where I get this thought in my mind that I really have made a fool out of myself. I still get those moments where I think I need to retract back to my shell and my comfort zone & stop trying to put myself out there. But, I have to keep reminding myself why I have done this in the first place. There have been times in the past where I have given into my own negative self-talk & have retracted back to my comfort zone, where I know I am safe. But, I won’t let myself do that this time, because I know where my potential is. You never know your potential & what could happen, unless you try. But, you have to remember to keep going. Keep moving forward.

The most important thing that I’ve learned this past year, especially in the last 6 months or so, is how much of my life is in my control. It is so easy to look at the big picture and to think that it is completely impossible, but we have to realize what is in our control. That has seriously been a game changer for me! It seems like something so simple, but I know that a lot of people go through this as well & I hope that I can provide at least some inspiration to let your guard down & start living the life you’ve always wanted.

I encourage every single person reading this to start doing little things to get yourself out there, out of your comfort zone. To start living the life you’ve always wanted. I’m not saying big things, just small little changes that you can start doing today to help makes this possible. You are the only person that is in control of your own life!

We are all learning & growing every single day. Amazing things can happen, if we keeping working towards letting go of potential negative outcomes & start becoming our true, authentic selves. Now, let’s all get out there & start living our best lives! 💖

- Blissfully Jess2

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY: 5 things I love about myself & my boyfriend

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Valentine's Day Blog

It’s the season of loooove, right?! We all love celebrating Valentine’s Day… if you are in a stable relationship, of course. I believe that voicing our love ourselves is just as important, if not MORE important. No matter how you are celebrating, whether it’s gathering roses and chocolates, spoiling your significant other, or maybe you are riding the love train solo; however you are celebrating this hallmark holiday, I hope you take the time to treat yo self as well. We should show ourselves love often & everyday, but this day I think it is a good excuse to really do it, and do it well & over the top.

Self-care is extremely important, as we all know..right?! It’s also a different topic for a different day (soon!). I encourage everyone to take some time this Valentine’s Day to show OURSELVES some love, while we are showing our loved ones extra love as well. Whether that means pampering yourself a little extra, writing about all the things you love about yourself, or whatever else YOU need.

In honor of Valentine’s Day, this season of looove, I am going to write out 5 things I love about myself as well as 5 things I love about my boyfriend.

5 things I love about myself 💗

1. I never give up

Life has a funny way of throwing a TON of curve balls & bumps in the road. We’ve all been there, so I know you know what I’m talking about. I feel like no matter what I try to do, there’s always 20 things in my way that I have to overcome. Again, we’ve all been there. No matter what has happened throughout my life, I know that I will never give up. I’ve already come this far & I’m not stopping now!

2. I’ve learned to accept who I am

I remember always wishing I was better, smarter, prettier, skinnier, etc, etc. Again, I think we’ve all been there at some point in our lives. As humans, we strive to be socially accepted. We need social acceptance to survive. Therefore, we often feel like we need to be different than who we are to be accepted by others. It’s often very hard to be convinced & convince ourselves that we are just fine the way we are. 🙂 After many years of trial & error with learning about myself, I have finally learned to just own who I am.

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3. I have a great personality

Even though it took me a long time to accept who I am, I’ve always known that I have a great personality. I love how nice I am to everyone & how I truly want the best for everyone. It’s definitely a major part of who I am that I’m most proud of.

4. I’m uniquely smart & have learned to use this accordingly

This goes along with my first post, My journey from a struggling high school student to starting my own business. Smartness is something I definitely OWN now, because I felt so dumb for a majority of my life. I am now using my intelligence to make a difference in the world & I have to admit, it’s AWESOME. There’s no better feeling than being able to use your talents to make a difference.

5. I truly want to make a difference in the world

When you have a burning feeling in your soul that you really want to make a difference, it’s honestly an amazing feeling. Not knowing how I truly wanted to make that difference was hard because I knew that I had to do it somehow. To wrap up these 5 things, I am just very proud of myself for sticking to what I truly want to do in this world. I am still holding onto that burning feeling of wanting to make a difference in the world. No matter where life takes you, never forget about your passion & what you want to do on this earth.

Side Note: I have to be honest, coming up with the fifth reason was a little tricky. It’s sad to think that it took me a while to come up with only 5 things that I love myself. But, I did want these reasons to be thoughtful & good reasons to love myself. I think it goes to show that when you don’t take the time to think about all the things you love about yourself, you often realize that you forget how amazing you really are. I encourage everyone reading this to take some time to write out a list of things you love about yourself. We all need this reminder sometimes. 🙂

5 things I love about my boyfriend ❤

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For those of you who don’t know my boyfriend, meet Michael. We’ve been dating since October 2018 & he is truly a spectacular person! Also, my brother’s name is Michael. Yes, it is a little confusing & slightly weird.

Anyway… Here’s just a small glimpse at the amazing reasons why I looove him. ❤

1. He loves me unconditionally

The feeling of being unconditionally loved is an indescribable feeling. From the very beginning of our relationship, I automatically felt like I could be my true, authentic self around him.

2. He knows how to make me feel better

I am a very emotional person & with all the changes & everything going on in my life, he knows how to keep me grounded. It’s almost like he knows me better than I know myself. He know what I need from him to make everything better.

3. He makes me laugh

Laughter is the best medicine, right?! Being able to have those inside jokes & just laugh with each other is a feeling I can’t explain. I know understand why it’s important for your significant other to be your best friend, because we truly to just have fun together!

4. He supports me

Holy crap, this one is HUGE! I also never understood the true importance of support in a relationship until I met Michael. He came into my life right in the middle of my Mid-Twenties breakdown trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. With all of the changes in my professional career, he has been with me every step of the way.

5. He is my best friend

I know I already mentioned this briefly, but he truly is my best friend. He’s my rock. Keeps me sane. Makes me feel special & worthy of love. This is also something I never felt or experienced until he came along. He is the first person I call (other than my mom, of course) when good things or bad things happen. He’s there when I need to be cheered up or to celebrate success. We are truly just living our lives, enjoying the time with each other. It is an amazing feeling to be with someone who makes you feel like that.

All I have to say is wow. This exercise was very refreshing & leaving me feeling great about myself. I really do encourage you to take the time to take advantage of this hallmark holiday. Show yourself some extra love and remind yourself about all the reasons why you love yourself & how amazing you. We are all constantly stressed and worried about the future. It’s OK to take this time and reflect on how amazing you are. It’s your turn!

Now, what do you love about yourself?!

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First month of entrepreneurship

Who else thinks January flew by?!

The first month of the year did not go as I expected, but it never does, does it??

In November & December, while I was planning my business, I was super excited & energized to be working on my business. It was a cool feeling and I truly enjoyed working on it. But, the moment I made my announcement, everything shifted. I found myself getting overwhelmed and exhausted. A week in, I was thinking to myself, “what did I just get myself into?” It’s like everything became real. Up until that point, I obviously knew it was happening, but it didn’t really hit me until it became official. I immediately started feeling frantic, like I needed to get everything figured out. I felt like I had so much to do, I would get up early, sit down and have no idea what to do.

I did not decide to start a business because I thought it would be “easy”. But, I did quickly realize that I wasn’t as prepared as I thought I was going to be. That’s probably a main reason for why I was feeling so unsure when I would sit down to get work done. My schedule & tasks have changed so much over the last year and all of a sudden everything I do is completely up to me to figure out. I am running a one woman show. I do the planning, creating, developing, analyzing, making phone calls, initiating emails, etc.

A week into January, I felt like I failing at running a business. I got to a point where I had to ask myself,, “what am I even failing at?” I had to give myself a reality check and slowwww downnnnn. I had multiple messages on LinkedIn, a handful of people that were reaching out wanting to collaborate and build a partnership, a handful of people wanted to help me network. I mean, I had to remind myself that opportunities were sitting right in front of me.

I always like being prepared and no matter how long & hard I worked to prepare for the launch and get my business organized, I wasn’t ever going to be completely prepared. The unknown & unpreparedness are two top things that stress me out and overwhelm me. I quickly realized that I had no idea the opportunities and the work that I had to do. I also understand that this happens. I did lots of research afterwards to make sure this was “normal”. I now have those targeted Facebook Ads about being a stressed out business owner & realized that what I was experiencing is normal.

The important thing that I had to understand & remind myself is that you have two important choices: 1. Let yourself continue to be overwhelmed & let the situation control you OR 2. Learn from this situation & continue moving forward. This has been a life motto of mine forever & when you’re in the moment it can be so hard to follow through with the latter option. Especially when you don’t know how to move forward from the situation. It’s like you know that you’re doing something wrong & there’s a major life lesson, but you’re not entirely sure what it is or where to go next.

So, I began overworking myself, stressing myself out… falling asleep between 6pm-7pm because I was so exhausted. I was more exhausted by the feeling that I wasn’t sure what I needed to do to keep moving forward. This goes back to my feeling that I just want to be successful. I was so focused on trying to be successful right away & make enough money that I was getting overwhelmed.

So, I had to take a step back and analyze the situation and figure out what I needed to do to get myself on track and moving forward. Burn out is a very real thing & I knew I was heading in that direction if I continued doing what I was doing. I needed to get my mind & my focus back on track. I decided I needed to stop writing blogs for a little bit (even though I only had written 2 lol), let myself sleep in & start reintroducing a self-care routine! Towards the end of January, I decided to attend webinars, educate myself even more & developed an even better system to keep myself organized. I even came up with even more things that I want to do with my business. I’m continuing to gain more confidence in my abilities and where this business will take me.

This is an adventure. Honestly, working from home, being my own boss, building a business that I love & I am proud of, making a positive impact on people’s lives… that makes all of this worth it. At the end of the day, I am so grateful for this opportunity. I am truly blessed to be able to be building a life & a business that I love & gives me so much energy.

One of the most important lessons I learned in January was: Say “yes” more often. I had a handful of people reach out & want to learn more about what I do and see if there was an opportunity for collaboration. I ended up meeting a handful of people and learned a lot from each person. I’m learning more and more how to get out of my comfort zone & be as successful as I want to be.

I am young. I’m still learning. I’m still growing. But, we all are, right? You never stop.

So, how was your January?!

- Blissfully Jess2

How/ Why I Go To The Gym At 5AM

“You go to the gym at 5am?! You’re crazy.”

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Almost every time I tell someone that I go to the gym at 5am during the week, I get a “OMG you’re crazy!!” Every. Single. Time. You know what’s crazier?? I have the flexibility to workout at a later time, I choose to go that early.

In college, I would go to the gym in the afternoon, evening, whenever I had time. I was extremely flexible with when I could go, depending on my schedule. Sometimes I even went around 9pm. My first year after college, I also went in the evenings, typically 5:30pm-7:00pm after work. Eventually, it became a hassle get myself motivated to go to the gym at that time.

The last couple years, I have gone through a lot of changes, like most people. My schedule has changed, I’ve changed. Getting myself to the gym started becoming a hassle and a chore. I kept bringing my gym bag with me to work and end up talking myself out of going. I knew I wanted needed to go, but my desire wasn’t there. By the end of the day, my motivation & energy was almost gone. I just wanted to go home and relax. Even if I did end up going, I did not want to be there would typically end up getting in a very mediocre workout. Plus everyone goes to the gym at 5pm and it’s super crowded. Ugh.

That is why I decided to make the change.

Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about myself and what works best for me. Contrary to most people, early mornings is when I have the most focus and energy. I know I need to get my most important tasks done first thing in the morning because that’s when I’m at my best. So, I had a crazy thought to try getting in my workout before work. Get it out of the way so I can spend the rest of the day not worrying about it.

I love the peace and quiet of early mornings. There’s something so refreshing about being able to put in my headphones & crush a workout before the sun comes up & everyone else wakes up. You know what’s also crazy? There’s even “crazier” people in the middle of their workout when I get there.

Here’s what I noticed from making the change:

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I haven’t talked myself out of a workout since making the change
My mood is much better- I was waking up in a horrible mood almost every morning
I make healthier decisions throughout the day
I have more energy
I have much better focus
I get a quarter of a gallon of water in by 7am
My workouts are much more intense
My workout is done and out of the way by 6:30am

Granted, it took about 2-3 weeks for my body to get used to this new routine. I remember falling asleep at 4pm on day 3 of it. I started out with less intense workouts & stuck with it until it became a habit for me.

The thing is, you have to know yourself. Early morning workouts are not for everyone. Some people have much more energy in the evening, so that makes more sense. Going to the gym at 9pm sounds crazy to me! I prefer to be deep in REM sleep by 10pm.

You also have to be able to make adjustments throughout the years. Listen to your body and know what makes the most sense for you. 5am workouts may never be feasible for some people & that’s OK. For me, this is what works.

Fitness is a very important part of my life. Most people who get into fitness get this feeling because it’s almost like you get to experience life in a whole different way. You feel better about yourself, you have more energy, you’re pleased with what you look like. There are so many benefits. I felt lost & insecure with myself when I was trying to get myself motivated to go back to the gym.

For me, at this point in my life, going to the gym at 5am is what works for me! Maybe… just maybe you will like it too if you give it a chance. 🙂

-Blissfully Jess

My journey from a struggling high school student to starting my own business

Ten years ago, I was a struggling high school student. I remember spending all of free time trying to figure out homework assignments & studying hard for tests. I would go into school early and stay late to get extra help. I still failed almost every single test I took. I was constantly worried about being eligible for extracurriculars. I literally passed high school with test corrections and test retakes. It was hard not to feel discouraged because it seemed like everyone around me had no problems & I was on the brink of ineligibility.

I so badly wanted to be successful. But, I often felt like I was just not smart enough or capable of reaching the level of success that I wanted. At the time, I wanted to be a psychologist and get my PhD. But, how could I possibly achieve that if I can barely pass high school? Let alone get into a PhD program.

I have a super smart older brother who was just a year ahead of me in school. He is gifted academically, had artwork displayed in the hallway and has his picture hanging in the athletic wing.

“Don’t compare yourself.”

I have heard that so many times it’s not even funny. But let me tell you, it’s almost impossible. You can’t tell a teenager not to compare themselves to someone. It’s going to happen. You don’t want to be the sibling that was unable to achieve anything. Everyone knew my name before I even got there and had high expectations that I was never able to reach. It was hard. It was frustrating. But, I used it as fire to never give up on myself. I so badly wanted to be successful. I wanted to prove to everyone, especially myself that I am smart & capable of success, just like everyone else.

I wanted to go to college & get my education so I worked hard on my college applications. I flunked the ACT 3 times and barely got into Otterbein University. Otterbein was the only school that I got into & it was on the very bottom of the list of schools that I wanted to go to. They actually accidentally sent me a rejection letter then apologized and sent me my acceptance letter. Talk about BARELY getting in. Even though it was the school I originally didn’t want to go to, it ended up being the biggest blessing. I was taking classes related to my major that I was really good at and had an amazing, supportive faculty helping me along the way.

I failed my first exam.

This is when I knew something was wrong. So, I went to my doctor and ended up getting diagnosed with ADD. Some people might read that and think it was a cop out. But, let me tell you what. That first exam in college was the last test I ever failed. I was so relieved to be able to read a sentence and not have my mind drift into la la land. That’s literally what happened before I got treated. No wonder I could barely pass high school, I couldn’t pay attention long enough to read a sentence. ADD medications don’t make you smart. They help you focus.

Getting my ADD under control, taking classes I was good at and having a supportive faulty, I finally started feeling smart. For the first time in my life, I was actually able to fully embrace that feeling. For some people, that might sound incredibly cheesy. But, you have no idea what it feels like when you feel dumb for a majority of your life.

I remember being so excited. I figured out a study strategy that worked for me and made a schedule to help me be successful. I worked hard and ended up becoming a straight A student. It was amazing. I had so much stress lifted off my shoulders and I finally felt like I was capable of achieving so much.

By my senior year of college, I decided I wanted to take it another step further. I decided to take on an independent research study on top of my regular academic schedule and other obligations I had going on at the time. I ended up not only completing the project, but graduating with honorary distinction, presenting my project 3 times & getting accepted to present my project at the Midwestern Psychological Association in Chicago. Holy Crap.

Guys. I went from a 2.5 GPA student in High School to graduating college with honorary distinction & presenting at a conference in Chicago.

During my senior year, I also flunked the GRE to get into grad school. I studied so hard for the test and put everything I had into it. I remember getting home and looking at where my scores landed- 20^th percentile. I remember crying because I tried so hard & hadn’t had the feeling of failing in a long time. What it proved is that I am not the “smart” measured by general education & society. I’m smart in my own way. That score doesn’t accurately measure the level of my intellectual ability. But, it’s also hard to understand & comprehend when that score is used to determine your eligibility to continue your education. The unfortunate thing is, most schools don’t take applicants who scored below the 50^th percentile.

I didn’t get into grad school.

I remember feeling discouraged, frustrated & confused. My plan was to go to grad school right after college. But, I still never gave up and kept trying. Everyone kept telling me “You will end up where you’re supposed to be”, “Everything happens for a reason”, “This will open the door for bigger & better opportunities”.

One of the biggest lessons that I learned is that you have to trust the process. This is something that is much easier said than done & very hard to do when you are going through a similar situation as me. I had it in my mind that everything had to work out a certain way and something was wrong if it didn’t. I was comparing myself to others & seeing others reach the goals that I had set for myself. It’s hard not to compare yourself to others.

When I got let go from my 3^rd job of 2018, people kept telling me, “This will open the door for an even better opportunity”. Great! Can I know what this great thing is because I’m about to lose my mind?

Starting my own business never crossed my mind. It was a goal that I never set for myself because I didn’t think I had the personality or what it takes to do so. I was fine with it & didn’t really care. But, it ended up being what was meant to be. Everything that I went through, the process, now makes sense because this is what I’m supposed to be doing & where I’m supposed to be. I was struggling to fit in to the “smarts” of everyone else and keeping up with everyone else because I’m supposed to be building my own path. Just because I failed every standardized test doesn’t mean I’m “dumb”. Just because I’m an introvert, doesn’t mean I don’t have what it takes to be a successful entrepreneur.

Same goes for you.

If you are reading this and questioning how “smart” you are, feeling discouraged and/or don’t feel like you have what it takes to be successful, you do. We were all placed on this earth for a reason, to make a difference in our own way. We often have to go through certain experiences and situations to make things clear. It’s hard not to give up and get discouraged. Sometimes the path that we envision for ourselves isn’t the right path for us, that’s what ended up happening for me. The right path will become clear, after we hit certain obstacles along the way.

I’m extremely stubborn & if you are anything like me, you don’t really want to hear any advice. But, just take it day by day. Let yourself feel the emotions you are feeling with each day. It’s OK to feel angry. Just don’t give up on yourself.

The feeling of holding that LLC document brought on so many emotions. I felt so proud of myself for working through all the obstacles & never giving up. I finally made it!

If you or anyone you know would like to talk to me more about my experiences & journey, please feel free to reach out to me! I would love to help out in any way that I can.